A Sardonic Liaison
by Away From Sanity
Summary: 30 drabbles for the sarcastic relationship of Grimmjow x Ichigo. [yaoi, ranging from PG to NC17, PWP, TWT, AUish, cursing]
1. Savage

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

-------------------

**Chapter Title: **Savage

**Author:** gogodgene (Away From Sanity)

**Pairing:** Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom:** Bleach

**Theme: **#30, "Kiss"

**Disclaimer:** No, nothing belongs to me. Congratulate Kubo Tite.

**Notes**: Done for the LJ community '30 kisses'.

-------------------

Their first kiss had been something less than extraordinary. No sparks flew, no romantic feelings got in the way. It was something raw; an old feeling that was grinded into human nature itself. It was carnal and archaic, earthly and ancient. Their kiss had been brought out simply because of a few harsh exchanges of words and some nice new bruises here and there. Anything the two ever started, started with a fight. The ending to this fight, though, had been a complete, although not unpleasurable, shock to Ichigo Kurosaki.

After a couple moments of locking lips, they simply laid back in the grass, looked at each other, and asked themselves what the hell just transpired.

No one remembers who said it, but the first words spoken into the night were nothing more than, "Don't call this love."

-------------------

Kurosaki had _not_ been having a good night by any means. In fact, the whole day had been slowly draining down the shit hole. That _thing_, the Hollow, had done nothing but constantly tease him, taunt him, and overall be a complete jackass. Ichigo wondered how that thing thought it had permission to talk as it pleased. It really was completely annoying and he wished it would just keel over and _die_.

All day at school it complained on how bored it was. It complained about the lack of action, fighting and the staleness of an everyday life. The Shinigami substitute had been able to ignore it for sometime. After school it talked senselessly about its King's inner world. It asked stupid questions why it only rained inside his soul and never any other type of precipitation. It complained about the lack of things to do in said world and how staring at buildings all day got awfully boring. It especially complained that Zangestu was extremely boring for a Zanpakuto and would never fight with him.

Around this time, Ichigo could feel his fingers twitching. If only they could go around the Hollow's throat...

Even at dinner that evening, the Hollow continued to whine, complain, and ask stupid ass questions about nonsensical things. Kurosaki, because of his foul mood, snapped at everyone and gave clipped answers. When he finally couldn't take it anymore, he left the table with half of his plate finished. His family, who had been laughing and joking with each other, grew quiet. Even his father didn't say anything, which was strange in itself. Usually he would make up some lame line about eating all his dinner or he'd have to sit at the table all night.

Ichigo was secretly thankful his dad didn't ask anything. There was no way he could deal with his shit tonight.

The Shinigami stalked up to his room and decided that it was time to _find_ a fight. Maybe if he battled a couple minor Hollows, his own Hollow would shut the hell up for once. Placing his body on his bed, Ichigo stalked off into the night, sword in hand, hoping a Hollow would make an appearance.

-------------------

It was the third time this week Grimmjow had slipped away from Hueco Mundo. In the back of his mind, he wondered if anyone cared. He didn't even believe Aizen cared as long as he wasn't screwing with the self-proclaimed God's future plans. As long as he stayed off of the prick's radar, he was fine. Besides, what did Aizen care if Grimmjow continually obsessed over one Shinigami?

Jaggerjack wondered if Kurosaki would be out again tonight, fighting those miserable little Hollows. He had saw him a couple nights before fighting against some weaker beings. He knew Ichigo could take on other ones that were stronger, but it seemed as if the Shinigami was merely blowing off steam. There were no calculated movements, he wasn't being challenged at all. It was simply a matter of slash and stab until everything around him had faded back to whence it came. He had looked troubled, but Grimmjow thought nothing more of it.

He really didn't care.

-------------------

Ichigo plopped down onto a grassy embankment that overlooked nothing of interest. Some trees and such, but nothing more. He wasn't really sitting here to look at the sceneary, anyways. He had just dispatched his tenth Hollow and was looking for a quick rest. He had noticed that his Hollow side had become strangely quiet, but the Shinigami could feel the other's excitement and hunger for more fighting. He supposed the Hollow hadn't complained about Ichigo resting because it knew its King would soon get back up and into the fray.

_'I see you finally gave into a little personal 'exercise'.' _Oh God, thought Ichigo, it's talking again. _'And stop callin' me 'it'. What the hell is wrong with you? I have a gender ya know. I'm a fuckin' guy, just like you King.'_

_'Stop talking to me. I've had enough of your voice for one goddamn day.'_

_'Well, then, you tell me what ta fuckin' do around here. There ain't nothin' better do here than to talk ta your sorry ass. So maybe you should be a little kinder towards me, since I'm saving your pathetic butt most of the time.'_

_'Burn in hell.'_

_'I don't have to degrade myself by insultin' ya King, because as soon as you let your guard down, I'll take your fuckin' throne.'_

_'I kicked your ass once, I'll do it again.' _Ichigo could hear himself growling just beneath his breath. This Hollow pissed him off to no end. Ichigo had made it bow once to him. It'd be fun to do it another time.

_'Don't get so high and mighty, King. I mean, you've had one of those bastard Arrancar followin' ya for DAYS, but you've caught shit.'_ Ichigo immediately grew silent at this, realizing the deadliness of the situation. An Arrancar had been following him? He wondered where the being had been following and for how long. Then he noted that his Hollow was fucking worthless for not telling him.

_'Why in the hell haven't you told me?'_

_'Figured I'd let you play dumb. Eventually that thing was gonna attack you, and I was just waitin' for the opportunity.'_

_'You bastard.'_

_'It's not like a had a father in the first place, King. That doesn't work on me.'_

_'You would've just let that thing attack me?'_

_'I'm lettin' this one attack you.'_ Kurosaki was no idiot, and figured out quickly was his Hollow had meant by that last statement. He quickly moved to the side, escaping a _Bala_ blast that destroyed the little chunk of Earth he had been sitting on. Ichigo unsheathed his sword and quickly scanned the area. A well-timed Flash Step left him unscathed from the second _Bala _blast.

"Come out!" The Shinigami called. He didn't need to wait long either before a figure came from beyond the thick foliage of trees. It came as quite of a surprise when none other than only Arrancar he had fought came before him. Blue hair, feral eyes, and a jaw bone, the remnants of a torn-away Hollow mask; he knew this enemy, personally. "Grimmjow." The Epsada smirked a wicked grin.

"Aww, how sweet. Ya remembered my name. I'm touched."

"You're about to be touched with the business end of my blade." The blue-haired Arrancar snickered.

"Oh, scary. You're about as threatenin' as a kitten, Ichigo." Kurosaki gave little thought as to how Grimmjow knew his name; if Aizen knew it, then so did his underlings, he guessed. "All talk and no bite." Ichigo growled at the insult, already swinging Zangetsu around in a pinwheel motion.

"Maybe if I skewer you, my Hollow will finally close his goddamn mouth."

_'Thanks for callin' me a 'he' this time, King.'_

_'Fuck you.'_

"Oh, please, kid. You couldn't hit the broad side of a barn with that thing." The Vizard launched his blade with a burning ferocity. Grimmjow easily stepped aside, going in for the giant opening the kid had left himself in after throwing his sword. A quick jab to the face and Ichigo was down on his ass, glaring at Grimmjow. The Arrancar smiled down upon the Shinigami, thinking this victory was easily his. Ichigo smiled right back as he pulled his discarded blade back to him, Jaggerjack not any-the-wiser to this scheme. If the Espada hadn't hear the sounds of metal slicing through air, his whole top half would've been gone. Fortunately, the only damage sustained was a gouge on his side. He surveyed the damage as Ichigo stood once more, clicking his tongue at the blow.

"You ripped my jacket. It's not like that bastard Aizen just hands clothes, ya know," Grimmjow said, muttering a few choice words about his leader.

"Oh, I'm sorry I ruined your clothes. If you wanna have it replaced so badly, my _sister_ has great jackets that'd probably fit you." The Arrancar couldn't help but laugh at this. That little smart ass was at it again and if Grimmjow loved anything, it was a good verbal battle.

"Ah, well, at least I don't parade around with ripped clothin' like some angsty, loner, bitch." Ichigo's face contorted into that of annoyance. This could go on for _hours_ if he let it. Of course, Kurosaki is as stubborn as a bull and there's no way he's letting that fucking Hollow win this one.

"Listen, if I wanted clothing tips, I'd ask. Not too mention you know how to put on makeup pretty straight for a _guy_." Ichigo smiled as he pointed out the blue markings under the Espada's eyes. Grimmjow frowned just the tiniest. The first to lose their cool would ultimately be the loser.

"They're tattoos. Tattoos, which are for guys who have balls between their legs and can take a little pain." Ichigo's expression darkened.

"What do you know about pain, **Hollow**?"

"What do you know about being a man, **Ichigo**?" Both were locked in a battle of malevolent glares.

"_Fuck you_ and **burn in hell**."

"Stupid. _Bitchy_. **Asshole**." It could be said that both leaped at each other at the same time; really, that part didn't matter much. The following battle that ensued was purely about domination. Neither was looking to kill each other.

Or maybe they were.

Fists flew, limbs entangled, bruises formed. Grimmjow head-butted Ichigo into the grassy earth below them, watching as the teen held his slightly bleeding and aching forehead. The Shinigami growled at the Sexta Espada with complete and utter contempt. Grimmjow smiled in victory, leaning over the kid on the ground, and panted in exertion.

"You're still a bitch," Jaggerjack concluded through ragged breaths.

"And I still wish you'd die," Ichigo followed up. Before he could recognize what was happening, Grimmjow brought their lips together rather hard. Ichigo even heard their teeth 'clack' together. Being so completely off-guard left the Shinigami's mouth open to a rather frisky tongue which slid sinfully against his. Nothing but adrenaline and resentment running through him, Kurosaki fought back to regain his forceful position in the situation. The orange-haired teen gathered a clump of blue-hair in his fist and crushed the two of them closer together. It wasn't for the feel of two entities finally together, but for the fact that Ichigo was fighting to top. He eventually threw the Arrancar down, crushing their lips together. Jaggerjack let the teen have his little victory, enjoying the friction Ichigo left on his skin as his fingers trailed roughly along it. Grimmjow bit hard enough on the protruding tongue to draw blood, but neither cared. The taste of blood made the Arrancar only more excited. He pulled back and bit into Ichigo's lip.

"You're absolutely fuckable, kid."

"I try."

"There's that smart ass mouth again."

"People better than you love it."

"It's the only sexy thing ya have." Ichigo frowned, punching him in the face.

"At least I possess something sexy. There's nothing good about you." Jaggerjack pulled the teen into another heated kiss, smirking deviously.

"You'd best shut up, before I show you a better way to use that smart mouth of yours."


	2. As Good As It Gets

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: As Good As It Gets

**Author**: gogodgene (Away From Sanity)

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #12, "In A Good Mood" (Also for **30 Lemons**: #4, "The Thrill of the Forbidden")

**Rating**: _**NC 17**_ oral, anal

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

---------------

Ichigo's life immediately becomes a shit hole the minute he hears _midterms_.

He hates and **despises** that word so much, there should be _two_ underlines. He wishes this word was never invented by man. Couldn't teachers just call it 'The Test'? Or 'Big F-in Test' would be funnier. Midterms in general made his life a living hell. He could never sleep right or eat right because he spent most of spare time studying. Not to mention his friends would be upset with him for spending all his time in his room.

Now a week into the studying, Ichigo felt awful. He would have nightmares about his homeworks assignments.

_Nightmares_.

Not about Hollows.

Not about the Arrancar.

Not about Aizen.

Not about the biggest war in all of spiritual history that would be happening so very soon he could almost _see_ the first wave of Menos Grandes making their way here.

It would be about homework.

Ichigo isn't dumb by a long shot. He's actually very intelligent, but he has his reasons for being so anal about midterms and finals. It's really just to make his mom proud of him. His mother was as smart as they come; she would be upset if her son didn't live up to his potential.

The last thing Ichigo needed to put him in an even worse mood, was upsetting his fallen mother.

So, he studied. Long into the night, most nights. He hardly ever ate dinner at the table anymore. His sisters worried, and his father worried in his own _special way_ that could only be so _Isshin_. Ichigo never says it to his dad's face, but he's glad that he worries so much.

---------------

Midterms are only a couple days away. While people cram at the last minute, Ichigo lays on top of his bed, giving himself a break. He's been studying two weeks straight. He tired and he's sure his stomach hates him by now. Nevermind he kinda misses life outside text books and his small, cramped room.

The Shinigami looks out the window; it's 9 at night. His family has headed off to bed, but he was still up due to his just finishing up some neglected homework that wasn't as important as midterms. It's clear out tonight, no clouds and the stars show off in the night sky. Ichigo knows that if he stares at the moon long enough, he fall asleep with ease. It just calms him for some reason.

During the two weeks he's been having to study like a mad-man, Hollows have seemed to appear out of every nook and cranny of the city. The Vizard knows he's never been this busy and wonders if there's a stronger Hollow in town somewhere. Usually the manifestation of a large group of meager Hollows means there's an even stronger one not far behind. Right now, though, Ichigo doesn't have the energy to look.

Hell, he doesn't even have the energy to lift his arm.

His eyelids slip down, but he doesn't fall into a peaceful slumber just yet.

There's a slight problem that needs to be fixed first. Especially since that idiot has blocked out the moon's glow and it's not so comfortable anymore. Ichigo opens his eyes hesitantly. At first, he believes if he ignores the moron, he'll just go away.

He should know better.

"Wake up, Shinigami." Said Shinigami huffs in annoyance as he catches the silver moonlight glint off of almost electric blue hair. It looks really soft.

He didn't just say that.

"Grimmjow..."

"Finally got away from Aizen-bastard and came ta visit," the Arrancar smirked mischieviously. The teenaged Shinigami knows that smirk all too well.

"Well, you got away for nothing. I'm dead-tired and have no energy to put up with your shit tonight." Ichigo turned away from his window to face his wall on the other side of the room. This of course just says to Grimmjow, 'keep trying'. Unless you kick his ass and put out his lights, Grimmjow never quits.

Besides, once they finally get into the flow of things, Ichigo _never_ says 'no'.

The Espada crawls next to Ichigo very feline-like, as if looking for something comfortable to cuddle next to.

Or fuck.

Most likely the latter because all of Hueco Mundo knows Grimmjow Jaggerjack doesn't _cuddle_.

The Sexta Espada lets his hand slip onto Ichigo's waist, feeling the teenager freeze; in anticipation or fear, he doesn't know and doesn't care. Grimmjow gets what he fucking wants, dammit. He didn't come all this way to get cock-blocked.

"You're feelin' a little stressed, Ichi," Grimmjow whispers, using his pet name for the Shinigami. Jaggerjack doesn't know why Ichigo likes the name so much, but the kid blushes when he hears it. Grimmjow thinks it's so goddamn adorable when he does that.

He will never, _ever_ say that though.

In fact, forget what was just said.

"It's been a bad couple of weeks, so lay off," Ichigo growls, trying not to wake up anyone in the house. Grimmjow never relents, breathing against the Vizard's surprisingly sensitive ears. A tiny shiver, but the Hollow will have to do more than that to get the kid to melt against him. The Arrancar's fingers dance along the flesh of his hip bone and he can almost feel the blush that escapes onto the other's face.

A kiss along his jawline.

A nip on his neck.

"I can make it better," the Espada offers, the innuendo none-too-smartly covered up. Ichigo's not giving an inch, though, and it's wearing his nerves thin.

"I'm sure you could. Some other night." Grimmjow frowns in annoyance, pulls the kid down onto the bed so he can look him in the face. Little smart ass always knows how to push his buttons. The 'Not-Getting-Laid-Tonight' button is pretty big, though, so anyone could hit it. "What the hell do you want?" Grimmjow smirks, that jawbone making him look a little more sinister than intended.

"Ya know what I want, so don't play coy, kid." Jaggerjack nips on the boy's chin, the jawbone scraping gently along it. He kisses those sarcastic lips he hates to love and loves to hate so much. Ichigo humors him by giving into an open-mouthed kiss.

He should know better. Give the Hollow an inch, and he'll take a mile.

Ichigo _can't_ and _won't_ deny that tongue, though, as it slips and wraps around his. He does what he can to keep himself from being completely trapped in the Arrancar's net, and plays against the other's muscle.

He knows he's not as good as Grimmjow when it comes to this kind of stuff, but he'll never admit it to the sex god. Not only would it inflated the other's ego, but he would be an easy target to take advantage of in bed. He'll be damned if that fucking bastard gets the upper-hand each and every time during sex.

Ichigo's breath hitches as Jaggerjack's slim and powerful hands find their way under his shirt, and he knows this already going to far. He pulls back reluctantly.

"We can't do this here, you dumbass. My family's asleep, they'll fucking hear us." A suck along his neck.

"No, that's where you're wrong. The right way ta say that was 'They'll hear us fuckin'."

"I'm not gonna have my _little sisters_ hear two guys _screwing_ next door to them." A thumb pad against his nipple and he's straining to hold back the noise that's in the back of his throat.

"It's a kinky thought, though, right?"

"Jaggerjack," Ichigo growled. Grimmjow shuts him up for a few moments while he tests just how far he can go before Ichigo starts resorting to violence. Ichigo bites his tongue just as he feels the bony hands start playing with his pants' fly. The Arrancar swallows blood, but is smiling all the same. "I'm serious you ass-clown," Ichigo manages to say while whispering and yelling at the same time. An oxymoron only he can pull off.

"So am I."

"Listen, you horny bastard-." Another kiss, but an unexpected grinding of the hips. When their kiss breaks, Ichigo isn't saying anything.

"Don't worry. We'll just be _really_ quiet." Even before the Shinigami can form words, actually _syllables_, Grimmjow has pushed his shirt up and started to nipping a trail down to his pants. The Shinigami becomes just as red as his name as the button pops off quickly, and the zipper slides down _so fucking slowly_. He bites his knuckle to keep from making any sound, but seeing that blue savage of a Arrancar over his erection is the most fucking orgasmic sight he's ever seen.

Ichigo can feel his teeth already biting into the skin, because there's that swell of sharp pain that accompanies any cut or bite mark. His free hand grips his bed sheets as that sinfully pink tongue slides gracefully along his length. That damn tongue is like a lizard's and Grimmjow knows this; he can do truly diabolical things with it. Kurosaki watches in mind-numbing pleasure as Jaggerjack sucks him off like a popsicle; seriously, he looks likes he's _really_ enjoying himself down there. Ichigo holds back a moan as he watches thin lips engulf him, tongue swirling, licking, and wrapping around him. With any noise drowned out except the slurping, the panting and the hot, heavy breaths along his dick, Ichigo can't help but pay close attention.

It's enough to make him want to scream.

"Oh _**GOD**_..." he manages to whisper, behind his knuckle and clenched teeth. Too his utter dismay, though, Grimmjow rises from his sultry position to smile at him. Ichigo was in the right state of mind to complain, but shut up the moment the Hollow started to strip himself. The Shinigami followed suit, already too far into this to quit. After he had released himself from the tight bonds of his clothing, Kurosaki immediately attacked the other's mouth, needing that friction that could only be caused by skin on skin. A small moan escapes from his mouth as the Hollow's talented tongue finds his, nevermind his teeth that keep nipping at him. The blue-haired Espada pushes both of them to the bed again, already pushing the teenager's legs apart. He pulls away from the kiss to examine his prize and congratulates himself yet again for getting the biggest asshole (no pun intended) in the world to fuck him.

That smart mouth, that constant 'bad-ass' frown, the furrowed eyebrows, taunt muscles under slightly tan skin: it's enough to make Grimmjow Jaggerjack horny every time he sees the little sardonic teenager. Ichigo is downright delicious in the very apex of their sexual encounters.

"Goddamit, you're gonna stare a hole through me, you ass." Grimmjow smirks.

"I'm takin' in the prize of today's hunt, Ichi. Give me a moment."

"The hunt's still on, moron. Now are you gonna finish me off, or not?" The Sexta Espada throws him a lop-sided smirk. He loves it when Ichigo talks dirty, even if it isn't really all that _dirty_.

He's just too blunt, really.

"I won't disappoint." The Hollow trailed his long fingers onto Ichigo's length, gathering the droplets of precum onto his fingers. He watches as Ichigo shudders, closing his eyes. Jaggerjack knows the Shinigami is embarassed because of the red blush on his face; he's such a woman. Kurosaki feels the spindely fingers find their way inside, wriggling around just because the Arrancar knows it makes him convulse like crazy. It's such a weird feeling; he can't help it. The teenager desperately tries to keep quiet as he feels those long fingers scissor him from the inside, every so often finding that _spot_ and rubbing against it.

He wishes the Espada wouldn't tease him so much. It's really more annoying than it is endearing.

What passes as a minute or two seems like hours and Ichigo growls.

"Fuck me already, you stupid motherfucker."

"I would never fuck your mother." A glare of death. "I like guys better anyway. Women talk too much." With speed and accuracy that could only come from the sex god known as Grimmjow, he enters the teenager below him up to the hilt. Kurosaki gasps, but he never says it's in pain.

He knows he's a fucking liar.

The Sexta Espada antagonizes the Vizard, going at such a slow pace. Ichigo impatiently rocks his hips; if the Hollow was going to fuck him, he should do it fast and hard. Their foreplay already had him riled up enough as it was.

"Fuck..." Ichigo cursed, just as the Hollow started getting the picture and picking up the pace. He loved to draw things out with the Shinigami. The teenager had never learned patience was a virtue.

And here he was trying to be nice and let the boy adjust. Well, he'd never try that shit again.

Thrust after thrust had Ichigo almost yelling out in passion. He had long forgotten to keep his mouth shut and wondered faintly if this was waking anybody up. Grimmjow hit that spot dead on almost every time. Ichigo could feel his climax just around the corner. He gripped his bed sheets, thrusting his hips in time to meet the Arrancar's hard cock. Everything was blurry, and he was dizzy. This always happened right at the end. Hell, he could even see stars.

"Grimm...I'm gonna...Ngh...Fuck, fuck, _fuck_." The little stars that had been in his vision exploded with him, he himself moaning deeply. Grimmjow was done as well a couple seconds after, sighing in a perfectly complete sort of way. Both struggled to regain their lost breath, staring at each other through heavy-lidded eyes. Jaggerjack made his way next to the warm body already laying down, content in every way possible at the moment.

He wasn't cuddling. Really. He was merely laying awfully close next to Ichigo.

Said Shinigami turned to the Arrancar next to him.

"Ya know, if you gave me more blowjobs like that, I'll be willing to let you into my pants more often." Grimmjow smirked.

"That's a great thing ta hear. Next time I need a hole ta fuck, I'll offer my tongue's services."

"That kind of language is what makes our fucking relationship so goddamn intimate."

"I like it when ya curse obsessively after screwin'." Ichigo noticed that Jaggerjack was already on the move again. Apparently, he had been a nymphomaniac in another life. "It's a turn-on," the Espada said, as he kissed the other's shoulder.

"We fucked once. That's my limit for tonight you prick."

"C'mon! I wanna fuck again." Ichigo was so glad that the fucking moron had been laying closest to the side of the bed, because after that statement, he immediately kicked him out.

"Ow, my fuckin' back! Ya fuckin' pain the ass!" Ichigo smiled as he tugged his covers around him in a cocoon-like state.

This is really as good as it gets in their relationship.


	3. Sweet Tooth

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Sweet Tooth

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo Isshin x Ryuuken: If you look REALLY HARD, squint, and turn your head to a 90 degree angle.

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #23, "Candy"

**Rating**: M Innuendo

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

---------------

Ichigo happens to love a lot of things, contrary to popular belief. He loves his family, his friends, women on the beach in barely-there bikinis, his sister's cooking, fighting Hollows, winning, and sex with a certain bat-shit crazy Arrancar. There's only one thing he loves more than anything in the world--even more than Grimmjow's tongue (and he's love that quite a lot). In fact, he would marry it if humans were allowed to marry inanimate objects.

Kurosaki Ichigo loves Pocky.

God, does he love it.

His favorite kind is Choco Banana, and, surprisingly, hates Strawberry. The irony.

He can name all 82 flavors; even five seasonal ones, five regional flavors, and one special occasion that came out in 2001. That's a total of 93 flavors in all.

The person to start this craze was none other than his parents. His mother had bought him a simple box of Chocolate Pocky as one of his birthday gifts when he was six. His father kept indulging this 'tradition' ever after his mother was gone. He even bought a new flavor everytime along with the chocolate. It was really his way of saying, 'Here's your mother's present, and here's mine'.

He loves his dad for doing that.

He'll never let him hear that, though.

Ichigo has yet to try all the flavors, mostly because he has not eaten all five seasonal flavors and missed the one Special Occasion box.

He's not obsessed.

Really.

---------------

It was a hot Sunday afternoon. His father had said that he was going to meet up with an 'old friend' (who apparently was a geek in college, but Ichigo didn't really care and didn't listen either), and his sisters had gone out to a movie. He had decided to stay into today on the off chance that you-know-who would show his sorry ass.

He had left the Shinigami for two weeks without any sign that he could by to visit soon. It had been a shitty week and the teenager could really use a good lay to smooth out his frazzled nerves. Nevermind that there weren't any snacks in the house, so being a vegetable in front of the T.V. today was out of the question. So, instead of just going outside for a walk, he stayed inside with the air conditioning and caught up on some homework.

He might walk later, if he decided it wasn't too hot to do so.

Or, he could deal with that black hole that suddenly appeared in his bedroom.

Wait.

"What the hell?" Ichigo questioned out loud, standing up from his seat. After gawking for a few moments, he looked around his Shinigami badge; which he was always misplacing. Damn his inablitity to keep track of shit. He knelt to look under his bed--he remembered dropping it on the ground after a long night of hollow hunting and had just fell into a coma of exhaustion--, but finding nothing.

"Presentin' already?" Kurosaki bumped his head on the metal bars holding his bed up in surprise of the voice behind. He ferverently rubbed the back of his bruised head and looked behind him to see none other than that smug smile of Grimmjow Jaggerjack. Then, as if finally catch the drift of Jaggerjack's statement, noticed he was on his hands and knees with his ass in the air.

He blushed slightly and sat the fuck down.

"When the fuck did you get here?"

"Didn't ya see my nifty, black, little vortex, there?"

"That thing was yours? Don't be fucking poppin' in when ever the hell you feel like anymore, okay? Freaks me the fuck out. I thought it was the enemy." The Arrancar laughed in tone that said 'you're retarded'.

"Ya must be confused, Kurosaki. I _am_ 'ur enemy. Duh." Ichigo rolled his eyes, moving to sit on the edge of his bed while tending to the nice, big bruise on his head.

"Oh, so what do you call what we're doing? _Arch-enemy-fucking_?" Grimmjow sighed and sat in the chair across from his Shinigami sex toy.

"No. It's a love, hate thing. You hate to love me, and I _love_ fucking you." The teenager snorts in a 'I can't believe you just fucking said that' kind of way, taking great notice of how the Arrancar across from him is sprawled out nicely all over his chair.

The only thing he hated about the Espada's body was that goddamn hole. It had 'eaten' Grimmjow's abs, and Ichigo's imagination could only do so much.

"Oh. By the way." The Sexta Espada dug around in the pocket of his hakama to produce a small box.

Ichigo's eyes immediately lit up.

He knew that box anywhere.

"Stole these for you." He didn't really care in all actuality that Grimmjow had stolen them; Jaggerjack could've _killed_ somebody for that precious box and Ichigo wouldn't care at the moment. "Saw ya had a bunch of empty boxes of 'em saved up, so I thought ya might like another."

Kurosaki almost _dove_ for that box his Grimmjow's hands.

"Gimme 'em." Ichigo took notice of that sly grin on the Espada's face.

"Do ya like 'em _that_ much?"

"Yes. Now **give** them." The teenager snatched at the precious box of treats that was pulled away from his grasp. **Again**. He really hoped that Grimmjow wasn't serious about playing this game with him. He would get VIOLENT if need be. "**Grimmjow**."

"I went through all that trouble to get these to ya. I think I should get somethin' in return." Ichigo held out his hand, eye twitching. This would get ugly if left in this situation for much longer.

"I'll do _anything_ you want when you let me have the _box_ first."

"Anythin'?"

"I'll let you fuck me into the ground, but I want those first." Grimmjow smiled like a kid in a candy store, and quickly threw Ichigo the box. Even before the teenager could open it, Grimmjow had them both on the ground with himself on top. Kurosaki didn't even mind. He put a stick covered in chocolate into his mouth as the Arrancar smirked over him. "No cryin' 'uncle' after the third time, okay?"

Suddenly, Ichigo didn't think this was a good idea.

---------------

Both Shinigami and Hollow were exhausted after two hours of sex. True to his word, Ichigo hadn't fought to regain any kind of control during their encounter. He had even let Grimmjow screw him from behind; the only position he hated. He didn't like showing his back to people.

Jaggerjack sighed in complete content, resting in the sun on Ichigo's carpet. He had wanted to screw the Vaizard so bad he couldn't bring himself to move both of them to the bed; which was only a staggering foot and five inches away.

"I gotta bring more of those things the next time I come over," the Espada stated, resting himself near Ichigo's neck. Said Shinigami was currenlty eating the rest of his chocolates (which he had eaten in between their resting), and staring up at his ceiling. He had felt extremely cold, now, without any clothes on and the air-conditioner running. So, he let Grimmjow lay almost on top of him for extra warmth. "What are those things anyways?"

"They're Pocky. It's a candy."

"That's the only thing I miss about bein' alive. I got to eat as many sweets as I wanted. Now I can't eat shit." Ichigo looked at him with a confused face.

"_You_ had a sweet tooth?" Grimmjow growled, his secret already given away.

"So!? What'd you think I ate?" Kurosaki shrugged against him.

"I don't know. I figured you for an alcohol and smokin' type of guy."

"Breakfast of fuckin' champions." Jaggerjack sighed, watching as Ichigo nibbled on the Pocky stick, almost jealous. Of course, he didn't fail to notice how Kurosaki would suck off some of the chocolate off the stick, and then lick the remnants. "Oh man. If I had the enegry to be horny right now, I would be." The Shinigami stopped eating his candy to look at the Espada behind him and then back to his candy. He did a second time just to make sure the bastard had been making an innuendo about the biscuit stick.

"Oh. You _sick bastard_."

Ichigo never looked at a piece of Pocky the same way again.


	4. Jealousy

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Jealousy

**Author**: gogodgene (Away From Sanity)

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #26, "If Only I Could Make You Mine"

**Rating**: PG 13 Cursing, SAP?!, TWT-ish

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

---------------

It had been a couple days since they had taken that orange-haired wench into their custody. Actually, the correct phrase would be 'into Aizen-_sama_'s custody'. He had been grateful to get his arm back, but of all the other kinds of torture Aizen-bastard could've put him through, this was the worst. Assigned to watch over the bitch along with that fucking know-it-all Ulquiorra. Of all the goddamn meanial things he could've be in charge of to do... Apparently, the bastard of a God was still sore at him for trying to take over that town. Which was fucking ages ago; didn't the guy know how to let things go?

He doesn't care so much that he's incharge of watching a prisoner. No, that he could care less about. He only cares now because he has to watch this one bitch. If there was one thing Grimmjow hated almost as much as Aizen, it would have to be this orange-haired bimbo. The one who always made Ichigo smile and laugh. The one who always had his Shinigami boy toy worrying. The one who gave silent pleading looks to the orange-haired Vaizard; ones that said those three simple words of devotion. If she was so in love with the kid, then why was she so shy? Tell him, Grimmjow would think.

_Tell him so he'll rip out your heart._

_He has me_.

_He doesn't need anyone else_.

That woman was always around Ichigo. His Ichigo. Like a lost dog.

It was infuriating. How could his Shinigami go for something that clingy? Ichigo needed someone just as independent as himself; Jaggerjack knew how much the kid liked his space. Yet, here he was, helping this girl, smiling with this girl, letting this girl cling to him.

What was he, some fucking prince? Grimmjow knew him a lot better than most people; he was a cocky, smart-assed, son of a bitch. Sure, he was brave, naive, and helpful, but that personality stopped after he was done saving everyone. That "Hero" everyone loved was a facade. It broke when everyone stopped bothering him.

The Sexta Espada liked it better that way.

---------------

Grimmjow despised this situation, but not because he was against taking prisoners (no mercy was his policy). He was entirely against this woman staying here because she was linked to Ichigo. It should be understood that said Shinigami was not exactly happy with the situation. Especially when he knew Grimmjow had been on the mission to capture her.

It had not been a pleasant home coming the night he had gone to see his Vaizard.

He had slipped in his favorite window like always, trying hard not to look too excited. It had been weeks since he had seen the Shinigami, due to the loss of his arm and all. He didn't want to confront Ichigo with only one arm. Not only would it be a complete embarassment, but it would make Jaggerjack look as though he were searching for pity. The last thing he needed was to be pitied by Ichigo.

Kurosaki had been lying face down on his bed, his arms wrapped under his pillow. Grimmjow could tell the teenager was tense; he knew exactly what about, too. He had just taken one of his friends away from the Shinigami and into Hueco Mundo no less. It's not that he wanted to, anyways. Anything to get away from that girl.

The arrancar sat on the other's window sill for what seemed like quite some time. He didn't move until Ichigo had decided to speak.

"What're you doing here?"

"I thought by now ya wouldn't hafta ask that question." The Shinigami never even turned to look at the blue-haired Espada.

"Get out."

"I'm kinda not in yet."

"Then go away."

"Gotta stomach ache or somethin'?" Jaggerjack tried to play off the situation as a joke. Usually, if Ichigo was in a grouchy mood, just being persistant worked for the Sexta Espada. Kurosaki would eventually give in.

"Fuck off."

"I thought that phrase was usually 'Fuck You'?" The situation suddenly hit the proverbial shit-fan when Ichigo leapt at Grimmjow, taking him by the collar.

"Don't try that innocent shit on me. Quite frankly, it would never work for you, even if you were fucking kid-sized. Your a fucking bastard and I. fucking. hate. you."

"What the fuck did I do?" Jaggerjack asked, suddenly quite serious. He didn't expect things to turn out this shitty.

"You _know_ what you fucking did and you _know_ what Aizen's gonna do to Orihime. You also _know_ that if you don't fucking help me get her back, I'll castrate you."

"I'd like to see ya try, bitch."

"Why did you take her? Why?! I thought you and Aizen weren't on best-fucking-terms? Why'd you listen to him?"

"For 'ur fuckin' info, _I _didn't take 'ur fuckin' bimbo. Ulquiorra did. He's the fuckin' weasel that went in 'n messed with her head. I was only sent ta make sure no one fucked with the plan."

"But why?! You know she's my friend! What you're telling me is total bullshit! You know I'd be like this!" Jaggerjack huffed, knocking the boy back onto his bed. He pinned the Shinigami's appendages down so the other couldn't fight back. It wasn't his fault, he didn't even _want_ the fucking girl two miles in his vacinity. He hated the bitch.

"I did it because that's what I was told! I was ordered ta fight and make sure no one interferred with Ulquiorra! If you think I was gonna die outta sheer fuckin' nobility just because the whore was one of 'ur friends, then 'ur dead fuckin' wrong. I like livin', thanks, and I ain't about to challenge Aizen over a fuckin' woman. I don't even want her sorry ass anywhere _near_ me. I hate that bitch! I was just followin' orders."

"Like the good bitch you are, right?" Ichigo snarled. Grimmjow kept his cool, suprisingly. He had a hunch where this was going and he didn't like it. If keeping himself calm would make Ichigo understand and not end up at the conclusion that Jaggerjack was thinking, then he would do so. Let it not be mistaken, though, that the arrancar didn't want to slap some sense into the Shinigami. He wanted nothing more that to get in a brawl and solve their problems that way.

"I'm not gonna end my life over a bitch that I hate, just so you'll keep toleratin' me." Grimmjow refused to use the word 'like'. "I mean, if that bitch bein' gone means that you'll focus on me a little more, then I'd rather her be in Hueco Mundo with Aizen." Kurosaki said nothing, but Jaggerjack knew the kid had figured out what the statement meant. Yes, he could admit he was jealous of the woman to Ichigo. He wasn't a girl, so he didn't feel bad about it. "Don't be so fuckin' silent. It's not like I said 'I love you', or anythin'..."

"You still betrayed me."

"I know I fucked up-."

"Goddamit, this isn't a fuck up, Grimmjow! You've fucked up a lot, but this is betrayal, they're different! I... I can't even look at you anymore. We're back to being enemies."

"We were enemies before, ya idiot. How is this any different? If Soul Society sent ya an order to kill me, you'd follow it, wouldn't ya?" Jaggerjack saw the hesitation in the teenager's eyes and knew this relationship suddenly meant a lot more than he intially thought. He shook his head. "Fuck," he replied, realizing the weight of the situation. "Fuck. Just--. Whatever. Ya know, whatever. I'm outta here." He let the Vaizard go, turning to leave out the window from which he entered.

"I'm going." The Sexta Espada stopped to indulge the other.

"Goin' where?"

"To Hueco Mundo. To save Orihime."

"...'Ur gonna get slaughtered."

"What do you care? I'm just telling you so you'll be able to report to _Aizen-sama_ who's killing all the Espada."

"Ya won't get past me."

"Why's that?"

"Because the next time I see ya, you'll be dead."

Grimmjow turned away from the Shinigami and didn't bother to look back.

---------------

The blue-haired arrancar watched outside of the pitiful, single window the whole room had. Anything was better than looking at the orange-haired girl stare at her tray of food. It was pathetic, really. If she thought that Aizen would let her starve herself to death, she was real wrong. The bastard needed her powers badly, and wouldn't _dare_ to let anything life-threatening happen to his guest.

The truth was, he couldn't stand to look at the woman. She had cost him everything that he actually cared to think about. Most of all, she had cost him Ichigo, the only other being in exsistant that he even remotely liked. After he had come back from the real world, he still hated her. Hell, if it was possible, he hated her even more.

Stripped him of his normalcy he had with the Shinigami... He hoped the bitch died.

As he chanced a glance at her, he was reminded of the Vaizard he lost and suddenly wished he had stolen one last kiss from the teenager.

One last thing to remind him that he used to have a better life.


	5. Exposed

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Exposed

**Author**: gogodgene (Away From Sanity)

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo (Isshin x Ryuuken kind of)

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #2, "news; letter"

**Rating**: PG-13 Cursing, suggestive themes

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

**Notes**: OHMIGOSH, guys. Two updates back to back. I spoil you.

---------------

Sunday.

It was a day that Ichigo had come to love.

Not only was school out, but most Sundays he got to lounge around in his bed with a warm body next to him. This warm body being none other than one Grimmjow Jaggerjack. And, as to add more reason to love Sundays, his family was gone most of the day. So, this of course meant precious alone time with the Sexta Espada. _Alone time_ was important when he hadn't been laid all week.

But, for now, he was extremely hungry and needed to get out of bed. The only problem with this great idea was that said warm body was currently sprawled out over him.

All over him.

This would've been a turn-on in any other situation.

"Grimm." 99 percent of the time, saying his name would never wake the bear from his slumber. "Grimmjow." No response. "Jaggerjack." It never hurts to try.

Of course, when trying falls through, you can always elbow someone in the ribs. The faint snoring that Kurosaki had heard before disappeared, a string of curses taking their place.

"Dammit, Ichi. That hurt a little," said the groggy voice next to the Shinigami.

"Get up, retard. I'm hungry and you're fat ass is keeping me away from the kitchen." Grimmjow clicked his tongue, turning over to lay by the window, and burrowing in the teenager's blanket. It wasn't _his_ fault that he was almost sleeping on top of Ichigo. The kid only had a twin-sized mattress for God's sake; they could barely fit together most nights.

"At least I'm not complainin' about hunger, _lard-o._" Ichigo glared at the back of Jaggerjack's held, elbowing him in the spine for good measure. Grimmjow turned his head to give the kid a menacing glare, but it came up short and just looked grumpy. "Would you freakin' stop with the elbows? Jeez! You're too bony to be elbowing me!" The substitute shinigami stood, pulling on his boxers that had been tossed aside last night. Not like he cared, he was the one who had made the first moves.

"I thought you just said I was fat," he replied, pulling on a t-shirt. Grimmjow rolled back over, sighing in annoyance.

"Whatever. You're a fuckin' stick."

"And you aren't?"

"At least I have some muscle tone," the Espada continued, ending with a yawn.

"We have the same body type, you asshole."

"Nah. My cock's bigger."

"Prick," and with that, Ichigo slammed his bedroom door. Grimmjow smiled to himself, eyes still closed; another battle well won.

---------------

The Sexta Espada finally made it downstairs about a half hour later. He was kind of tired, but lacking warmth on one side of the bed had been a mood killer and forced to get up. Ichigo saw the blue-haired hollow out of the corner of his eye come in and was surprised the ass had enough decency to throw his pants on. Last time he had walked around naked, which had caused them to argue for a while.

Of course, just after that, they had defiled the kitchen table.

Kurosaki called it a vicious cycle.

Grimmjow called it being adventurous.

The Espada sniffed the air, watching as the Vaizard worked over the stove cooking something. Jaggerjack had always wished that the idiot would stop cooking around him; it made him jealous. He would never voice his opinion though, because then he would look like a pussy.

Or be made fun of.

So, instead, he tried to focus on the wooden table he was currently seated at, but he had a short attention-span so it didn't work. He looked around the table to survey the few objects that were on it; a newpaper, a coffee mug from this morning, a letter to Ichigo.

Wait.

Jaggerjack snatched the letter up, unfolding it to look for the writer's name. Ichigo finally sat down with his plate full of scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast, almost going for the first bite, but distracted by what Grimmjow held.

"What's that?"

"It's a letter."

"Hey, man, don't be reading my family's stuff."

"It's not theirs. It's to you." Ichigo quickly grabbed the letter away from Grimmjow's otherwise iron grip, and skimmed over it. He didn't touch his food.

"Does your dad always sound like that?" Jaggerjack questioned. The shinigami didn't answer, reading the letter in embarassed horror.

_To my lovely son Ichigo,_

_Your sisters have been complaining about the noise coming from your room lately. I know teeanger's don't have a lot of control, but it would be greatly appreciated if you could quiet down. I've been hearing it lately, too, and I sleep downstairs. Daddy think it's okay that you have a _special_ friend, but you two really are too loud._

Ichigo heard his plate slide across the table, and didn't care. He glanced at Grimmjow and knew he wasn't going to eat due to obvious reasons.

_Why I remember my college days. These were before I met your mother, of course, but I also had a _special _friend. He was quite the shy one, but he was sure loud in bed_.

If the orange-haired teen had eaten anything yet, it would've been on the floor by now. He vaguely saw Grimmjow out of the corner of his eye playing with his food, looking at the fork, and getting the glimer in his eyes that meant he was about to do something mischievious.

Okay, so vaguely wasn't the right word, but he still didn't care.

_You would probably know him if you saw him. He looks a lot like that friend of yours with the glasses. I think that's his son. Anywho, we'd get urges too every once in awhile: especially when we had knocked back too many. But we learned to keep ourselves under control because it isn't classy to be moaning wantonly into the wee hours of the morning._

"Ichigo, look at this. This is hilarious."

_Of course, it was learn to control ourselves or be kicked out of the dorm._

"Hey, look!"

_You should've seen his face. It was hilarious. In hind-sight I probably shouldn't have joked about it. I didn't get laid for a month._

"You're not lookin'!"

_That's pretty bad for a college kid. Especially for me. He was pretty talented, so it made it all the worse._

"Ichigo." Was Jaggerjack over there whining or was it just Ichigo's nerves?

_Anyway, main point, learn to be quiet from now on or you'll have to find some place else to get nookie._

His _father_ DID NOT just write that.

_Try not to wreck the furniture (you know what I mean),_

_Your loving father_

_P.S. Is your friend apart of a gang or something? I don't think you should be sleeping with people who've had tattoos. And that hair! It's weirder than yours. I trust your judgement, though, so introduce me sometime._

"Ichi! Look!"

"What! What! What IS IT Grimmjow?!" The shinigami turned his eyes to the arrancar who picked up the fork with a smirk, and swallowed. Ichigo quirked an eyebrow and watched as the Espada stood up. The two waited a couple moments before saw something fall out of the whole that was his stomach in another life.

There was silence, while Jaggerjack just grinned like a madman.

There was more silence.

Ichigo couldn't handle all this weirdness.

"Dude. Gross."

"Aw, c'mon, it's funny!" Ichigo waved him off, still in shock about the letter.

"It probably would've been funny if I didn't just read the most embarassing letter of my entire life."

"Oh yeah. That was pretty bad. I didn't know 'ur dad was gay."

"He's not gay!"

"Bi. Whatever the fuck. He's weird though."

"I can't believe they've all heard us! Oh my God, my sisters must be traumatized." Ichigo's forehead promptly met the tabletop. Jaggerjack sat back down, chuckling a little.

"They'd learn about it sooner or later, Ichi."

"I was hoping later. Did you see that he caught us in bed together?"

"Oh really. Hmm. Never noticed." There was silence as Ichigo wallowed in embarassment on the table, while Grimmjow tried to keep that taste of the scrambled eggs in his memory. They weren't half-bad, considering Kurosaki cooked them. He didn't know the kid could cook.

Then, everything stood still. Both persons at the table promptly looked at each in surprise at the same time.

"Wait."

"Wait." They both said.

"If he could see you--," Ichigo started.

"Then that means--."

"Oh shit."

"Oh shit."


	6. Asylum

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Asylum

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #20, "The Road Home"

**Rating**: PG 13 sap?! wtf, sir?

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

---------------

Hueco Mundo is for those of a parched heart. This is why Hollows feel at home here; there is nothing to hope for once you have seen this place.

Grimmjow doesn't belong. While all the other Espada have accepted their fate, Jaggerjack questions his own exsistance and constantly wonders if fate hates him. All the other Arrancar bow to Aizen's feet as if he were their God. The Sexta Espada hates the bastard with every ounce of his being. The Hollows do whatever Aizen commands. The blue-haired being defies everything the man has ever told him.

This is not his home.

Grimmjow can faintly remember when he had a home; before dying, before becoming a Hollow. He remembers a body of water, the smell of salt on the air, cigarette smoke, long sunlit days, and colorful nights filled with people.

A home is where people like you, people have fun with you, people care for you. Not here. Everyone jumps at their own shadow; everything is paranoid. You never know who tomorrow's enemy will be. No one can remember what fun is here. This is a place for the desolate. They all clamber onto that last strand of organization, humanity; they're all-knowing and all-seeing God. No one cares for each other here. This is not a family. You are a number, easily replaced by the next person in line.

The Arrancar hates this place. This sea of sand where you can look up into the only colorful thing here, but can't enjoy it because _He's_ watching. It's enough to make you go _insane_.

Grimmjow misses color, water, fresh breezes, and feelings of a human soul. The only good thing to ever come from this place was the opportunity for a good battle. A war. He supposes he was like that in his other life, too; a fighter with no regrets. He feels alive in the middle of a battlefield.

This is why in this boring, uncaring, non-colorful world, he hates everything.

And he wishes it were all just a bad dream.

---------------

It's hard to escape to from this hell hole. Everyone is always keeping tabs on everyone. Anyone who's ten feet away from another person will be asked 'Where are you going'. It's pathetic.

So when Jaggerjack decides that if he stays here any longer he's going to kill somebody and wants to leave, it only takes two seconds before someone stops him. It was just Grimmjow's luck that it had to be Aizen-bastard's little boy toy.

"You're leaving again." Of all the goddamn people.

"Ya got somethin' to say about it?" Grimmjow turned to the accursed midget, effectively cutting off his concentration on the portal in front of him. It closed in silence.

"Aizen-sama is always curious as to your whereabouts. You always leave without warning." The Sexta Espada snorted.

"So fuckin'-what? It's not like I'm goin' against his plans or anythin'. I just gotta get outta here sometimes because ya'll bug the _shit_ outta me."

"Aizen-sama does not appreciate your abrupt absenteeism." Grimmjow stared at the hole in Ulquiorra's neck and wondered off-handedly if he could reach down and pull out the Hollow's insides. Maybe his vocal chords; the other Espada's voice always annoyed the hell out of him everytime he opened his mouth. The blue-haired Arrancar clicked his tongue, not bothering to reply, and opened back up the portal which he had accidentally closed. "He will not tolerate this much more," Ulquiorra continued, his facial expression never changing.

"Like I give a flyin'-fuck."

---------------

It was night in the world of the living when he arrived. He didn't particularly fit into this world either, but he had a shelter here. The Arrancar headed straight for the only human house he knew to find solice from a long day in the land of nothing.

He hovered in front of the only entrance to the house that he had ever taken and stared at the open window. He looked to the sleeping figure in the bed right beneath the pane of glass, almost looking peaceful. Grimmjow knew that the teenager kept his window open because of the Espada's spurratic visits; it was somehow endearing. Jaggerjack climbed into the window, the soft bed looking very inviting. He promptly settled next to the Shinigami, who was snoring quietly, and pressed himself close to the sleeping kid. Then, before closing his eyes, he kissed the back of the sarcastic teenager's neck. He would never display this kind of behavior if the kid were awake. He sighed contently and drifted off to sleep.

This wasn't home, but it was better than nothing.


	7. Mi Secreto

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Mi Secreto

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #3, "Jolt!"

**Rating**: PG 13 Cursing

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

---------------

Like most secret relationships, they are bound to have some issues with actually keeping _the secret_. Ichigo doesn't know how hard they've been working to keep his and Grimmjow's relationship--popularly known as 'fuck-sessions' by said Arrancar--a secret. Actually, the only one who's been worried about it is the Shinigami. The Sexta Espada could care less about anyone finding out (except bastard-Aizen), which is probaby why he pops in whenever he feels like it.

But there's been times when they were almost discovered.

_Oh_, there's been _really bad_ times.

Three times to be exact.

And Ichigo remembers all of them quite well.

---------------

The first time had been on a school morning. Ichigo had woken up a little later than usual, and hadn't taken a shower the night before. The Shinigami decided that personal hygiene was a higher level than school was, so he had hopped into the shower that morning despite the time. This was a bad move on his part in the grand scheme of things, because a certain Arrancar had decided to drop in that day for some 'morning nookie'. Grimmjow had first been slightly surprised to not see Ichigo is his room.

The Sexta Espada had his Shinigami's schedule pretty well mapped out and knew when and what times Kurosaki would be in his room. Not finding his boy-toy didn't deter him, though, and he persistantly searched throughout the house. Of course, he had kept as low a profile as possible, carefully screening his own presence.

Until he found the young Vaizard, of course. Then he couldn't give a shit.

Grimmjow smirked to himself as he took off his Espada uniform in front of the shower drapes. This was new territory to him; Ichigo's shower had been left alone for some odd reason (despite other flat surfaces in the house like the kitchen counter, and the couch, and the dining table...). He intended to make good use of it, now that the opportunity presented itself. Jaggerjack slid open the curtain with a predatory smile on his face, chuckeling when Ichigo stared at him wide-eyed.

"WHAT THE F--?!" But he never gave the boy time to finish his remark. He quickly made his way under the hot, running water and snapped the curtains close. Kurosaki was quickly silenced when thin lips assaulted his, the steaming water making this experience somehow more enjoyable.

If that was possible.

It didn't take long before the Shinigami substitute opened his mouth in need. No matter how many times he denied it, Ichigo was just as horny as his Espada counterpart. Once they began sometime, they never quit.

"Oi, Ichigo!" The teenager clamped down on Grimmjow's tongue.

_Totally_ by accident.

"Mother Fu-!" Kurosaki put a hand over the other's mouth before he finish what he was going to say. He, himself, didn't answer right away, though. His dad had just invaded the bathroom with Grimmjow there. He had to think of something, before his father completely ruined the mood.

"Ichigo Kurosaki, you know you can't curse in this household!"

"You swear all the time," the younger Kurosaki spat back, keeping his hand over Jaggerjack's mouth. The Arrancar didn't enjoy that at all. He simply retaliated by licking Ichigo's palm, which he knew was more sensitive than need be. The Shinigami flinched, elbowing Grimmjow in the side.

Out of reflex, of course.

"I'm different. I'm your father. Now hurry up in that shower, you'll be late for school."

"I'll be late for school anyway!" Suddenly, the situation was pissing him off; not only had his moronic dad just interrupt a very good situation, but now the Sexta Espada to his side wasn't giving up. The Arrancar held Ichigo's wrists tightly together, even as the Shinigami struggled and threatened, just with his eyes, to castrate the Hollow if he didn't stop. The Espada exacted his revenge, his tongue playing against Ichigo's ear. The Shinigami couldn't stop the reflexive shiver that came about due to the action. "Besides, if you don't get out," Ichigo managed to shout at his dad, "_I_ can't get out anytime soon, idiot!"

"Fine, but hurry! You're wasting the hot water!" And with that, Isshin retreated. Ichigo began to wonder slightly why the man had stayed around for so long.

It was as if his father came into the bathroom intentionally just to bug him.

But he couldn't question that now; not with Grimmjow's lips and tongue all over his neck. Along with his counterpart's ministrations and the scare of being caught in the act, he had somehow become aroused.

He was not smiling, though.

"I think ya owe me an apology, Ichi. Ya elbowed me, for fuck's sake."

"Well, maybe you'll stop fucking around when someone else is in the room!" Grimmjow laughed at this.

"Ya can't say ya di'n't like it."

"Fuck you."

"Gladly."

---------------

The second time they were almost caught, was that same day, but later in the afternoon. This was by far the worst case scenario, though, as they would've been caught in the middle of screwing. Not in the middle of something more family-friendly.

Ichigo had cock-blocked Grimmjow that morning, saying that he had to go to school and he deserved to be deprived of sex because he was a 'fucking idiot who won't listen'. Of course, Jaggerjack wouldn't let the kid get away with bossing him around like that and had come back to the house that afternoon. It was the fastest time that Ichigo had ever seen his clothes come off, but after he got over the initial shock, he was soon pleading for more. Kurosaki had concluded that the Espada gave the best blowjobs ever, even if he had never recieved any others from anybody else.

The Shinigami was convinced that the Arrancar was a porn star in his past life. He would've been perfect for the job; sensual tongue, cut muscles, good-looking, and a seven inch cock to top it all off. He was perfect like a banana sundae with two cherries. Perverted images meant throughly.

Ichigo watched intently as a salivia strand, mixed with his precum, came off of his erection and stuck to the end of Grimmjow's tongue. It was downright erotic to see that feral smirk and that image combined into one look on someone's face. The Shinigami could've came right then and there and been happy for the next couple of days.

Grimmjow licked his smiling lips.

"Hey, Ichi..."

"Huh?"

"I wanna take you from behind, so turn over." And suddenly, the Vaizard wasn't so happy.

"_What_?" He **hated** that position. It gave the Arrancar so much control; he couldn't stand that smug smile on his face when his ego (among other things) was inflated. "No fucking way."

"C'mon! Ya owe me!" Ichigo continued to frown. Jaggerjack sighed in defeat. "Fine, if that's what ya want, I'm gettin' outta here." Kurosaki could not stop the surprise and sudden refusal of his own idea.

"Wait, what?"

"I'm leavin'. All I wanna do is fuck you from behind, and won't even let me have that. Ya almost bit my tongue in half and ya elbowed me in the ribs. This is how ya say 'Thanks for totally not revealing what the hell we were doing'?" Ichigo blushed in embarassment, almost feeling bad. He was stopped by a voice before he could continue.

"Oi! Ichigo!" Said Shinigami's eyes popped open. Of all the goddamn times Kon could show up. Thank God his door was locked. "What're ya bein' so loud fer? I can hear ya breathin' heavy an' shit in there! What the hell are ya doin'?" The Vaizard was yet again interrupted before he could comment.

"Get outta here ya beast!" Grimmjow yelled to the door, smirking. He was _so_ going to get back at Kurosaki for almost denying him. **Twice**. "Can't ya tell that Ichigo is busy gettin' fuc-?" A loud crash made up the last of the sentence as Ichigo kicked Grimmjow to the floor.

"Ichigo? Who the hell else is in there?"

"Nobody Kon! Get outta here before I let my sister play dress-up with you again!"

"You're such a damn brat, Ichigo!" And with that, the stuffed animal was gone. Ichigo let out a breath of relief and looked to the Arrancar currently on the floor, looking up at him. There was silence for a moment, both parties glaring at each other. Jaggerjack made no attempt back onto the bed, Kurosaki knowing fully what he was waiting for. The teenager blushed, suddenly not being able to look at the Hollow.

"You gonna fuck me or what?"

---------------

The final time that Ichigo was almost caught with his Arrancar partner, it was the morning after the Kon incident. It was a Sunday, and since Ichigo had no school on Sundays, he had decided to sleep in a little. Grimmjow was surprisingly warm compared to his chilly room, so laying there an extra half hour wouldn't hurt.

Or so he believed.

He had next expected his sisters to come barging into his room at eight in the _fucking morning_. The Shinigami, with his mastery of reflexes, had sprung up the minute he heard his door open, trying to hide Jaggerjack's body. The Arrancar was such a fucking log when he slept, so there was no chance that he would sit up and be seen.

"Ichigo! Breakfast!" Karin and Yuzu stopped immediately when they saw their brother, almost completely naked.

And was that another body in his bed? It would be suffice to say that both girls' mouths couldn't properly function.

"Hey! I'm not decent, dammit! Didn't dad teach you how to knock?" It was a completely absurd question because even Isshin himself didn't knock on his son's bedroom door. Both girls retreated quickly, trying to forget the fresh memory, and yelling out 'Sorry' as they slammed his door shut. Kurosaki sighed.

This was getting goddamn ridiculous. He turned his tired eyes to the sleeping Hollow and frowned.

"Hey." No response.

"Grimmjow." Still snoozing like a bear in hibernation. Ichigo growled, punching the sleeping Espada in the head.

"Hey, motherfucker! Get up!" Jaggerjack yawned, turning over to look at Kurosaki. He didn't even the bruise forming on the back of his skull.

"Mornin'."

"Don't 'Morning' me, bastard! We almost got caught! **Again**!"

"Ya handled it, didn't ya?" The Hollow said in a tired voice. He chuckled at the angry expression on his Shinigami's face, patting the other's cheek. "No one knows, so everything's good, yeah?" He pulled the teenager in a kiss, smiling still. Ichigo had noticed long ago that Jaggerjack was almost a completely nicer person in the morning. "Now lay back so I can get my morning cock."

Nevermind.

"You're a fucking bastard, you know that?"

"But I'm _you're_ fucking bastard. Besides, I didn't hear you complaining last night." The Shinigami frowned, finding it impossible to argue.

"Pervert."

From that day on, neither were jolted into surprise by pesky intruders.


	8. Investigation

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Investigation

**Tie-in Chapter(s)**: Exposed (highly recommended)

_Mi Secreto_

Asylum

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #13, "Excessive Chain"

**Rating**: PG-13 cursing

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

**Notes**: So, a couple people asked for a continuance (here and on and I am never one to deny. Especially when my brain is in "Run-Away Plot Bunny" mode.

---------------

Isshin had known about it for awhile.

The shinigami-teen's father had known about it since Ichigo had gone that one night in a fit of rage to go kill some hollows. He had felt the familiar, rough reiatsu of an Arrancar, and knew that the situation would probably turn out for the worst. Of course, he wasn't allowed to help; that's what Urahara was for. If Ichigo desperately needed to be saved, his friend could take care of the beast. Besides, his son had come home relatively safe from that night.

He never expected Urahara to report _what had actually happened_ to him.

It was on a nice day, over a afternoon lunch the two were having, that Kisuke had decided to indulge the boy's father in the information. Of course, knowing Urahara for so long meant he would beat around the bush with it, because he was a bastard like that.

"What did you say?"

"The Arrancar and Ichigo. They were kissing." Okay, maybe he felt that being blunt would be the best approach here. Even though Kisuke had divulged the information so plainly, Isshin was still confused.

"Kissing?"

"You know. Butterfly, X, caress, make-out, peck, smooch, tongue, swap spit." Kurosaki would always be jealous of the store owner's ability to be a walking thesaurus/dictionary/encyclopedia. Damn prodigy.

"The enemy and Ichigo?"

"Yes," he replied sing-songily.

"The _**enemy**_ and Ichigo."

"Yes, Isshin."

"The enemy--."

"Okay, that's enough."

"and Ichigo."

"I hate you, sometimes," Urahara murmured as he drank from his tea. Kurosaki mulled the information over in his head, trying to reason why Ichigo would kiss the enemy. Probably an Arrancar out to specifically kill _him_. His son wasn't prone to kissing anyone, so what would give him the balls to kiss an Arrancar? It didn't make sense.

"Are you sure? You're not pulling my chain again, like last time when you said that Ichigo would inevitably turn evil and there was no way of stopping it?"

"You just made that up."

"Maybe."

"I was there almost the entire fight. As soon as I felt the Espada--yes, it was an Espada, don't interrupt me," Urahara quickly said, already seeing that look in Isshin's eyes. He wondered if the man asked those questions because he was being annoying. "I went to go have a look see and make sure your son didn't die. Because, we all know you've got some weird hang-up about your son finding out your a shinigami. Which is stupid in my opinion, because it would probably answer a lot of his questions."

"Don't judge me, Kisuke," Isshin said smiling. "We all know you're the town liar. I've never seen someone cover up a mountain of information as good as you."

"Yeah, well, you live and learn."

"So, they were fighting before or after they kissed?"

"Before. Name-calling and such, you know, immature things you could only expect from a 15-year-old and an Espada who probably never made it to his middle twenties. They wrestled around for a little--."

"Kinky."

"And here you were about to go crazy because of a little kiss."

"Anyway?" Isshin urged.

"_Anyway_, they continued to fight for a couple more minutes until the Arrancar pinned your son and promptly tried to maul his face off. It's a hate love thing, I guess."

"Huh." Urahara looked at the other in disbelief.

"After all that whining and after that story, all you can say is 'huh'?"

"...Hmm. Yeah." Kisuke threw his tea in the other's face.

---------------

The black-haired ex-shinigami captain also remembered the first time he had caught them.

In the act that is. Well, actually, he didn't really know if they were going to do it or not, but with all the noises those two were making, it kind of hard not to come to that conclusion.

The point being, he had never heard his son curse so loudly in his life. Even if his son had cussed, though, he didn't really care; it was just surprising. What did make him run up the stairs was that familiar reiatsu; the Arrancar's. He didn't know why the hollow would show up in his _household_ of all things, but he wasn't about to leave his son alone and quite _naked_ while an Arrancar roamed about. He quickly opened the door, making sure he was quiet as possible.

He was too late, though.

The Arrancar's clothes were on the floor. And there were _noises_ coming from the shower; noises that spelled "Make-out session in progress". So, he did the only thing he could to keep his son from making a bad decision.

"Oi, Ichigo!"

"Mother fu--!" The Arrancar's voice. He couldn't tell who the Espada was cursing: him or Ichigo. It took his shinigami son a moment to answer, so he filled the silence for him.

"Ichigo Kurosaki, you know you can't curse in this household!"

"You swear all the time." Ah, there was that smart-assed retort he knew. He could've left at that point, but he wanted that Arrancar to know that if he was thinking of doing what Isshin _knew_ he was thinking of doing, he'd have to deal with the kid's father first. They weren't so alone afterall.

"I'm different, I'm your father. Now hurry up in the shower, you'll be late for school." Now Ichigo had to hurry out of there because his father knew he was in there. Isshin congratulated himself on the idea.

"I'll be late for school, anyway!" Nice try Ichigo, but it won't work. "Besides, if you don't get out, _I _can't get out anytime soon, idiot!" Damn, he caught Isshin there. Sure, he had seen the boy naked when he was younger, but things were different now. Plus, Ichigo would most likely kick his ass if his dad saw him naked. Teenagers.

"Fine, but hurry up! You're wasting the hot water!" And with that, Isshin retreated, once again congratulating himself from keeping his son away from anything that was remotely sexual. He wouldn't admit out loud, but he just as protective of Ichigo as he was his daughters.

Too bad he was too late on the 'no sex' thing.

---------------

It was a Sunday morning.

So far, it was _good_ Sunday morning. That is, until Karin and Yuzu came racing down the steps with horrified expressions on their faces. He tried to ask what was wrong, but Karin buried her face in the paper and Yuzu immediately darted for the stove, even though she had been done cooking a couple minutes ago.

"What's the matter with you two?"

"Nothing!" They both blurted. Isshin scratched his beard in a confused way, but it eventually clicked into place when he thought about it enough. He carefully rose from his seat, watching as the two girls turned his attention to him.

"Where're you going?" Karin asked.

"Nowhere."

"W-well, Ichigo's not up, so don't bother him." Was she trying to protect her brother? Strange, indeed.

"I'm not going to Ichigo's room. I'm check something in the clinic." What a fat lie. He was too interested now, but refraimed from racing up the stairs to barge into his son's room. The ex-shinigami captain carefully made his way up the stairs, placing his ear against Ichigo's door.

"Hey," he heard from inside the room. Sounded like he was trying to wake someone up. "Grimmjow." What a weird name. Then came the sound of a distinctive 'wack'; probably from Ichigo hitting his sleeping guest. That boy needed to learn some patience. "Hey, motherfucker! Get up!" His son had such a potty mouth.

"Mornin'." Isshin sighed to himself. The Arrancar's voice. Those two were awfully close.

"Don't 'morning' me, bastard! We almost got caught! **Again**!" That must be why the two girls were so freaked out; they had probably seen Ichigo almost naked and then the stranger in the bed next to him. Isshin couldn't blame then, and would make his son pay later for traumatizing his poor sisters.

"Ya handled it, didn't ya?" What a lazy drawl. Isshin couldn't believe his son was sleeping with such a bum. "No one knows, so everything's good, yeah?" He heard the sounds of a quick kiss and a sigh. It was more in annoyance than pleasure. Definetly Ichigo's sigh. "Now lay back so I can get my mornin' cock." If the older Kurosaki wasn't so worried that Ichigo would find out he was a shinigami (and a former captain no less), he wouldn't have thought twice about busting down the door to kick the Arrancar's ass. How dare he use such perverted language around his son. Son of a bitch.

"You're a fucking bastard, you know that?" Isshin smiled at Ichigo's denial. So, his son did have good judgement afterall.

"But I'm _your_ fuckin' bastard." That was the nicest Isshin had heard the Arrancar yet. "Besides, I didn't hear ya complain' last night." That bastard had defiled his son!

"Pervert." Score two for the Kurosaki team.

---------------

Isshin had discovered something quite interesting about the Espada named Grimmjow some weeks ago.

It had been in the middle of the night. He had gotten up to use the bathroom, which required a trip up the steps. He had been too tired to keep from tripping over a couple steps, but even in his daze, he felt Ichigo's frequent visitor in his son's room. He knew his shinigami son was currently dead to the world, so there was no way that he was expecting the Arrancar over tonight. Isshin forgot that his bladder was screaming in protest and headed over to his son's door, suddenly worried.

Why would the hollow suddenly come in the middle of the night? Had all this time with Ichigo been a ruse? Was he finally here to kill him? He cracked the door to Ichigo's room slightly, trying to not make any noise. Noise might scare the Arrancar away and then he would never know the hollow's true intentions.

He saw through the small crack that the hollow was floating outside the open window, staring at Ichigo lying there. It was a somewhat scary sight. Isshin didn't know what the bastard was up to, but if he showed any hostility, his ass was dead.

To his utter surprise, though, the Espada climbed into the window quietly, showing no harmful intent on the sleeping teen. He simply crawled up next to Ichigo, settling in next to the shinigami substitute, and closed his eyes.

He had come...to sleep?

It was strange in itself to see the Arrancar come for no reason but to sleep, but to come all the way to the _real world_ to do it was extremely weird.

If Isshin knew anything about Aizen (besides that he was a pompous prick), it would probably be that he was no slave-driver. Therefore, all his servants and soldiers would probably have sleeping quarters back at Hueco Mundo. So why would this Espada come here to do nothing except slumber next to his son? He didn't want to rest on the only conclusion that came into his head, which was that hollow had come to be with his lover solely for the purpose of being there.

It was too romantic for a hollow. The older Kurosaki was sure that hollows/arrancars/Espadas couldn't love. Well, they could love, but they could only love violence, fighting, and gore.

So, Isshin drew another conclusion: this Grimmjow must've hated Hueco Mundo. Hating Hueco Mundo would ultimately make you hate Aizen, which was the next conclusion Isshin thought of.

Suddenly, this relationship looked like a good thing.

---------------

After thinking about it for a good couple of days, Isshin finally admitted to himself that he approved of his son's and the arrancar's relationship. Grimmjow wasn't looking to kill his son, and Ichigo seemed to be a lot happier as of late. The relationship would be probably turn out to be a good thing in the war to come, too. Having an Espada on their side would help greatly, considering he could get behind enemy lines and report what was going on. So, instead of congratulating his shinigami son up front, he wrote a letter that Sunday morning, and left it on the table.

Only needing a couple minutes with the girls, he had persuaded them that they should all go do something as a family. Karin scoffed at this while Yuzu was all for the idea. Naturally, the oldest of the twins asked about Ichigo going, to which he replied that Ichigo had been taking a lot of tests in school lately and was tired. He figured the kid could use some sleep today.

And with that, they left.

---------------

He knew Ichigo was acting reprehensive around him because his son knew he could see Grimmjow. Which obviously meant that he could see spirits (which he had lied about for so long). Isshin didn't know if the orange-haired teen had figured out if he was a shinigami or not, but it would probably be best if he didn't. He could continue to lie about it.

It only took a couple days after Ichigo had read the letter before the son finally confronted his father. As a bonus, he had managed to bring his _special friend_ with him. The older Kurosaki didn't turn around from his work, even though he felt them come into the clinic.

"Uh, dad?" Isshin smiled to himself, turning to look at his son.

"Well, if it isn't my adorable son! And who is this?" Now that he got a good look at the Arrancar, he surmised that he didn't look at that bad to begin with. If it wasn't for that broken remenant of the hollow mask, he probably wouldn't look as menacing. With the blue hair all spiked-up, the tattoos, and the cocky smile, he looked more like one of those people with forced 'bad-ass' images.

"Dad, this is, uh. Well..."

"I'm his fuck buddy." Ichigo glared daggers at Grimmjow.

"I thought we agreed that you weren't going to open your mouth?"

"And I thought we agreed that I never listen to you?"

"Well, could you have used some other word besides 'fuck buddy'? Asshole!"

"What did you want me to say? Hey, I'm Ichigo's boyfriend, how are you doin'? We're not _romantically_ involved if ya haven't noticed. All we do is fuck and fight!"

"I didn't say you had to call me your boyfriend!" Isshin sighed as the two continued to argue. This could go on _forever_. He shook his head, looked bored, and leaned against the operating table waiting for them to finish. Ichigo fired back remark after remark when Grimmjow challenged him. The 'boyfriend' coversation dropped, the two arguing about something entirely different. He suspected it was about what he said in his letter, but he wasn't really paying attention. Now he was little skeptical about how useful Grimmjow would be if all he and his son did was fight.

Finally, he got annoyed by the argument and pulled them apart.

"Hey, whoa, c'mon. Let's be friends, here. I know you can do that in bed, so why not practice out of it, huh?" Ichigo immediately stopped talking, blushing hard. Grimmjow crossed his arms and looked away. "So, you're name's Grimmjow," Isshin started, trying to sound civil.

"Yeah."

"When did you meet Ichigo?" The two looked to each other, remembering the first time they fought. Could they really say that they met each other on the battlefield, which had ultimately sent the younger Kurosaki home in bandages?

"We were fighting." Ichigo looked to Jaggerjack incredulously. Apparently, he could.

"Fighting?" Isshin questioned.

"Long story," Ichigo thanked the heavens that the idiot hadn't started to describe in detail how the young shinigami got his ass handed to him. The elder Kurosaki nodded, accepting this answer.

"Why did you show interest in my son?"

"He had--."

"We basically have the same personality," Ichigo said, covering up whatever perverted thing Grimmjow was about to say. Isshin nodded again.

"And how long have you been sleeping with him?" The orange-haired teen knew that look in his dad's eyes and suddenly felt worried.

"A while now."

"Oh really?" The father questioned, suddenly pulling out something from behind the operating table. Ichigo's eyes grew wide.

"Uh, is that a baseball bat?" The Arrancar questioned. He looked to his lover, who mouthed the word 'Run'.

Isshin just smiled.


	9. Privacy

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_An Extra Drabble for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Privacy

**Tie-in Chapter(s)**:

Investigation (highly recommended)

Exposed

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Rating**: PG-13 [C'mon, these two curse a lot

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

**Notes**: So, you guys seem to love the Isshin and Grimmjow interaction because you asked for yet another chapter. As always, I am never one to deny so here you go. Hot off the press. More crack.

Also, I update whenever I get 10+ reviews on a chapter, so the faster you guys review, the faster I update.

---------------

"You threatened him with a baseball bat?" It was another one of those lazy afternoons. The Kurosaki clinic was slow, and the kids weren't home. So, what was Isshin to do? Go have lunch with his bestest-friend Urahara, that's what. Besides, it's not like the store owner was doing much these days anyway. He always had hi own store hands helping to inventory and then the Bount Detectors were always being put to some kind of work. Kisuke was mostly a figure-head by now.

"Yeah."

"You _threatened_ an _Espada_ with a _BASEBALL. BAT._"

"He looked kind of worried there for a minute."

"Isshin..." Urahara sighed, exhasperated by his friend's stupidity.

"Of course, the little ass managed to escape using that stupid portal thing. You know, the one where they rip apart time itself."

"Is there a reason for this lame idea?"

"Hey! The bastard has to know that I'm gonna protect my son!"

"Isshin. Ichigo isn't a little boy. He can obviously take care of himself."

"At least Ichigo didn't learn I was a shinigami. Point for me." Kisuke drank from his tea, cursing the older Kurosaki's ability to ramble on about something and not be perturbed by the fact that the store owner was ignoring him. Isshin was much like a toddler who craved attention; he was always doing stupid shit to get you to look at him. The store owner figured that if he ignored the elder shinigami from time to time, he might stop being so stupid.

It has been to no avail.

"Hey! Are you listening to me?" Kisuke snapped out of his mental ramble, looking to the bearded man across the table.

"No," it was useless to lie around the older Kurosaki.

"Figured. What I was saying was, we need to keep on eye on this Grimmjow."

"Why's that? He's not looking to murder anyone, so it really isn't our problem what he does with your son when no one's looking." Isshin growled, remembering how he first found out that they _indeed_ were having sex with each other. He still wasn't going to forgive the hollow for taking his son's virginity.

"Well, I meant, besides that. Maybe this relationship could be a good thing for us."

"How?"

"Well, since he's in the real world most of the time, one can only conclude that he doesn't like Hueco Mundo."

"Great deduction there, Sherlock."

"Would you let me finish?" Urahara waved a hand at him, telling him to go ahead. "Well, if he hates Hueco Mundo, then he must hate Las Noches. And if hates Las Noches, then he's gotta hate Aizen. You see where I'm going with this?" Kisuke just stared. Isshin stared back. A staring contest ensued. Out of the corner of his eye, Urahara noticed Ururu came into the room to give him another cup of tea. She did hesitate some, though, seeing as the two were staring quiet heatedly at each other. She backed out slowly. "DAMMIT, KISUKE. ALLY! ALLY!" The short black-haired girl ran, almost spilling the tea kettle on the ground.

"Hey, let's not curse around the children."

"What're you, my wife?"

"I heard your wife had to say the same thing to you all the time."

"_ANYWAY_," Isshin growled, "we could use him as our Behind Enemy Lines guy. He could report to us what exactly is going on at Las Noches, therefore none of our guys would have to go on any suicide missions." Urahara was quiet. "...What now?"

"Shhh. I'm cherishing the moment when you finally had a good idea," Kisuke smiled.

"You're an ass."

"The only flaw, though, is how you're going to get this hollow to trust you. Obviously he fights with your son enough. What makes you think he's even going to _talk_ to you?"

"We keep an eye on him. We'll find blackmail material."

"Or you could just set up another rousing game of 'Kick the Arrancar's Ass'. Oh wait, that would make you have to transform into a shinigami. Oops. Blackmail on you." Isshin ignored the smart-ass remark.

"I'll monitor him when he's in my near vacinity and you look after him when he's close to you."

"Fine," Kisuke sighed defeatedly, "but if I even have to watch one minute of them making-out, I'm out like a light."

---------------

"Helloooo, lovely family! Daddy's home!" Isshin yelled as he walked through the door. He hung up his jacket (it had been raining earlier) and tossed his shoes onto the mat by the door. "Hello?" The older Kurosaki look to the shoe mat and saw three extra pairs of shoes next to his children's. One pair look a girl's shoe, but the others definetly belong to boys. He walked into the kitchen, only to find four teenagers currently seated at the table with a giant map in front of them. The ex-shinigami gave them a questioning look. "Hi, lovely son," he began. "What are you and your wonderful friends doing?"

"Nothing," Ichigo stated quite bluntly.

"Well...then...why do you have a map across our table?" The younger Kurosaki began to say something when the orange-haired girl--what was her name again? Oh, yes Orihime--finished for him.

"We're planning a trip, and we need to look at a map to find out where we're going." Clever girl.

"Oh, is that so? That's great! I remember when me and my friends used to plan camping trips! We'd always have a map with us, because none of us were great with directions. We'd always get lost in the woods. Sometimes for days. Oh, it was horrible! We were always a complete mess when we finally got out." Ichigo looked around the table, noticing that only Orihime seemed to interested his father's stupid story. Chad and he had been friends for awhile, so the giant knew when to turn off his ears. Ishida...well...he was Ishida. He never listened to idiots. "Anyway," his father finally finished, "where's Grimmjow today, Ichigo?" The shinigami substitute froze. All eyes turned to him in surprise. Of course, Ichigo tried to stay calm. None of the people at the table would know about the arrancar; only Orihime had been at the scene of the fight, but she wouldn't know who Grimmjow was. Did she know? She looked like she knew.

The Vaizard was sure he was sweating bullets.

"Who are you talking about?" Ichigo asked, trying to give his father a secret signal that he needed to shut up now. Even if the other three didn't know who Grimmjow was, he didn't need them finding out he was sleeping with a guy. Ichigo was sure his dad was doing this one purpose."Ichigo, you know who I'm talking about. Grimmjow. The one with blue-hair." God, Ichigo thought, why not just show off a picture of him?

The teen rose from his seat, taking his father by the back of shirt and dragging him away. Once he got them out of ear-shot from the kitchen, he pointed a menacing finger at this father.

"Dad. You _CAN'T_ talk about him while my friends are here."

"Why not? He is your lover afterall. It's not very nice to not acknowledge him."

"Do you really think my friends want to hear about me sleeping around with a _**guy**_?" Isshin wagged a finger at his soon, clicking his tongue.

"Dearest son, if you didn't think your friends would approve, why would you do it in the first place?" Ichigo struggled with an answer, but setteled for growling.

"Look, I don't know. It just happened, but I'm not about to break up something that works, so just leave him out of conversation when they're around." Ichigo promptly walked away, still fuming about the fact that his dad had almost revealed his secret.

Well, at least he had one secret to himself: his dad still didn't know he was a shinigami.

---------------

This week was turning out to be shitty, Ichigo surmised. His father was constantly bothering him about Grimmjow now, and neither of them could get some peace around the house. Isshin tended to stay in more now-a-days, hoping to catch the arrancar and him...

Well, doing what, he didn't know.

"We need to find a different place to be alone," he heard Grimmjow say. Currently, they were laying in his bed, trying to figure out how to get the shinigami's dad to leave them the fuck alone.

"Well, I don't have any other places I can go, dammit."

"We could always go outside."

"Hey, I remember the last time we did that! My back hurt for a week!" He groaned, being shot down again. There was silence again. That is, Ichigo saw that devious smirk creep on the hollow's face. "What're you thinking?"

"It's Sunday isn't it?"

"Yeah...?"

"Well, you know how you like to get out more?" The shinigami suddenly didn't like where this was going. "Let's go to your school."

"What?!"

"C'mon, it'll be fun. Maybe someone will catch us..."

"My wonderful son!" Both bed occupants bolted upright in time to catch the younger shinigami's father burst through his son's door. He was smiling like the idiot he was, oblivious to the fact that both the arrancar and Vaizard were plotting sexual schemes together. "My wonderful, hollow son!" Grimmjow gave the man a look of complete confusion.

"Why does he call me that?" The Espada whispered to the shinigami.

"I don't know. Don't question him, though, he'll just call you something more embarassing."

"What are you kids doing all cooped up here? It's such a lovely day! You should get outside and enjoy the sunshine!"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Ichigo asked, amazed at the level of stupidity his father had just reached.

"I don't want you kids wasting your youth! Get outside, dammit!" Grimmjow waved his hand around.

"Hollow here. No more youth to waste. Plus, you're not _my_ dad." Isshin looked shocked.

"As long as you're in this househole, and sleeping with Ichigo, you're my son! My wonderful, lovely, Arrancar son!" Ichigo shook his head as his father rambled on about Jaggerjack being his son (his arrancar son who was just so wonderful to show Ichigo the joys of adulthood), and leaned in to whisper to the other.

"Let's get the fuck out of here."

"Hell yes." Grimmjow grabbed the smaller Vaizard, tucking him under his arm, and carryin him out the window.

"Bye dad!" Isshin smiled, waving very enthusiastically out the window.

"Enjoy the day!"

---------------


	10. Guerilla Radio

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Guerilla Radio

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #14, "Radio-cassette player"

**Rating**: NC 17 [Suggestive themes, cursing, oral, sadism

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

---------------

It was one of those quiet, but rare afternoons. Ichigo's family had gone out to do something family-ish and he was content to stay behind to catch up on some needed sleep time. The past couple of nights had been a busy time for him. The hollows around town had seen it fit to take any hope of him getting eight hours of sleep away from him. He couldn't complain, though, since now he was getting that sleep that he had so desperately wanted.

"Oi, Ichigo."

Nevermind.

The Shinigami growled, cracking one tired eye open to look at his guest.

"If you were too stupid to notice, I'm trying to sleep." The familiar blue-haired arrancar nodded.

"I can see that."

"Good. Now leave," Kurosaki replied, burying his face back into his pillow. Grimmjow clicked his tongue, settling himself in a sitting position on the other's bed. Of course, it was only a twin-sized mattress, so he had to stretch his legs out over the teenager's prone and lying figure. He could hear Ichigo release a string of curses that the hollow was sure were just for him.

"Give me a break. It's not like I came ta screw ya or anythin'."

"That's a first," murmured the Shinigami. Jaggerjack smirked deviously.

"Oh, c'mon, Ichi. It's not like ya ever ask ta stop when we get goin'." Another string of curses. "I've never heard ya plead so much. 'Oh Grimmjow, harder, faster, right there--'." Ichigo picked up his pillow and swatted at the other's head. Jaggerjack blocked it simply by raising his arm.

"Shut up, you ass. You're so full of yourself."

"That's right. And most nights you're full of me." The Vaizard never felt his face go so hot. Grimmjow was laughing and that could only mean that Ichigo's face was just as red as his name. Ichigo wished his legs had the strength to push the heavier man off of him.

"Get offa me!"

"How 'bout I get off on ya?" Grimmjow laughed at he pinned his prey to the bed beneath them, but Ichigo had different plans. Using all of his body weight, the teenager was able to send both of them to the floor in a mess of limbs and now-aching knees, spinal chord, and head. "Fuck! What's 'ur deal shovin' me onto the floor all the time?!" Jaggerjack growled at the orange-haired kid above him. Kurosaki managed a triumphant smirk even though his knees, which had hit the floor pretty hard, were hurting like hell. Probably pinched a nerve.

"Oh, you didn't know Grimm? Dogs and bitches sleep on the floor." The Espada managed to flip them over once more.

"Then, we'd better get ya on the floor, huh?" He said, watching as the Shinigami struggled. Ichigo wouldn't let this fight go so easily now that his pride was at stake. He managed to squirm one arm away from the other's bony hand, thus launching a closed fist into Grimmjow's face. Unfortunately, though, the left hook was a bad idea in hind sight because his fist not only clobbered bone, but bone that felt like sandpaper. Jaggerjack stumbled from the blow, rolling off to the side, and Ichigo cradled his now bleeding knuckles.

"Fucker."

"At least I'm not an idiot and went to hit a hollow mask _bare-handed_!" The Arrancar wouldn't admit it, but the punch had kinda hurt.

"At least _I'm_ not stupid enough to _get hit _by the idiot punching my mask." Grimmjow rubbed at his jaw, staring the orange-haired teen down. It was going to be one of those days apparently. They'd fight, have sex, and then fight immediately afterwards. _Cest la vie_.

Grimmjow made the first move, opting to tackle Ichigo to ground again, and giving him a sucker punch to the face. Kurosaki thanked the Gods that the other's fist was merciful enough to leave his nose out of this fight. The last thing he needed was to go to school tomorrow with a bloody and broken nose. Although now he had a nice bruised cheek. He reciprocated the punch, aiming his right jab into the Arrancar's temple. Jaggerjack reeled back, his vision turning blurry for a split second. It was enough time for the teenager to managed a swift kick to the other's stomach.

Regrettably, Ichigo forgot the other had no stomach, so his foot stomped air and his leg shot through the hole that was once flesh, muscle, and organs. There was silence for moment. Grimmjow looked down to the leg that was currently resting in his hollow-hole and then to the throughly embarassed, hot-headed Shinigami. Despite the headache the Espada was now sporting, he managed to crack a smile, trying to keep himself from laughing whole-heartedly. Ichigo looked off to one side, knowing he had just made a complete ass of himself. Jaggerjack roared with laughter, knowing the Vaizard made a complete ass of himself, too.

"It's not fucking funny!"

"You're right," Grimmjow managed between laughs. "It's goddamn hilarious!" Kurosaki's hair stood up on end, angrier every second the Sexta Espada kept laughing. He finally snapped, grabbing the nearest blunt object and hurled it at the other's blue-haired head. The square, grey object collided with the hollow's forehead, which made it smash to pieces. Ruined squares of circuitry and grey, plastic peices of the object fell to the floor. Grimmjow's hands flew to the wounded spot on his forehead, growling in pain.

"**Fuuuccckk**! Did _you_ just _throw somethin' _at my _fuckin' head_?! Why the fuck would ya do that? Ya little fuckin' brat! Arg!" Ichigo found himself smiling for once, managing to wiggle his leg out of Grimmjow's stomach hole.

"You deserved it."

"What did I do? It was funny! C'mon, ya can't say it wasn't funny!" The blue-haired Arrancar rubbed the swelling and bruised spot on his forehead vigorously. If he had a headache before, he now had a migraine.

"It wasn't funny." Grimmjow continued to rub the spot on his head, looking down to the pile of debris on the floor. He picked up one of the face plate of whatever the thing was and turned it around.

"...Did you throw a tape-player at my head? This thing's a fuckin' relic! No wonder it crumbled to pieces." Ichigo looked surprised.

"Oh shit, really? Is that what it was?"

"Yeah," Jaggerjack turned the face plate around for Ichigo to see. The namebrand read 'Sony Radio-Cassette Player'.

"Shit. My dad gave me that."

"Hopefully when you were a kid." The Shinigami gave Grimmjow a questioning look.

"How did you even know what that was?"

"Huh?!"

"How did you know it was a tape-player?"

"What the fuck? How old do you think I fuckin' am?!" Ichigo looked away, almost embarassed.

"Well, uh, I don't know..."

"You must think I'm fuckin' a hundred or something!"

"Well, hell, I didn't know!"

"Well, I'm not a hundred, okay? I know tape-player's went outta style awhile back because CD players came around. But, shit, man, that thing hurt. I've got the headache of a life-time." The orange-haired Vaizard huffed, stood up and headed for his door.

"I'll be right back."

---------------

"Here." After a couple of minutes of trying to will-away the headache, Ichigo came back from his kitchen with an ice pack. Grimmjow gladly took it, placing it on his forehead, and sighing relief. Kurosaki sat down next to him, resting his head on the side of his bed. Jaggerjack glanced at the knuckles that had been bleeding before and found them wrapped in gauze bandaging.

"Ya know, there's this thing called 'sexual healing'." Ichigo glared at the Arrancar, trying to make him implode where he sat. "Alright, alright, fine. I'll try bein' less of a pervert, even though you like it." The Shinigami could almost see his ashes on the floor.

"Don't mistake this as an act of kindness Jaggerjack, I just wanted you to shut the fuck up."

"Well, you know, there's another way of getting me to shut up. You can let me into your pants," he grinned from ear to ear.

"I thought you didn't come to sleep with me."

"Actually, what I said was, 'I didn't come to screw ya', and now I've changed my mind. All that fightin's got my adrenaline goin'." Ichigo froze like a deer in headlights when he felt the other's breath on his ear. "C'mon, Ichi. I know fightin' like that gets ya goin' too." Kurosaki scooted away from the hot breath playing on the side of his face, his cheeks already flustered.

"We're both injured you idiot. Besides, do you not remeber that I dead-tired when you came over?" Grimmjow smirked, setting down the ice pack to creep nearer to orange-haired boy. "C'mon, I'm not kidding."

"Neither am I."

"What about that bump on your head you were bitching about?"

"I can ignore it for a little bit."

"Goddamnit, I'm not doing this with a fucked up hand!" Grimmjow smiled, taking the other's hand in his grasp. He pressed one of the knuckles down with his thumb, drawing fresh blood to the surface. "That hurts, you dick!"

"I'm sure it does, but I like that beat-up look on ya, Kurosaki. When I hurt ya," Jaggerjack emphasized by pressing down on another torn knuckle. Ichigo barred his teeth in seething anger. "It kinda turns me on. Ya get this look on 'ur face..."

"Oh yeah? Well, when I punch you in the _face_ it makes me smile. So, if you're gonna get horny by hurting me, then I get to punch your damn face in. Deal?" Grimmjow let go of the other's hand, chuckling.

"Fine, fine." Kurosaki shook his hand, trying to get feeling back into it. The nerves had gone numb from where Grimmjow had pinched them.

"Besides, fighting doesn't get me horny, you sadist."

"Only for you." Grimmjow put the ice pack back on the purple bruise. "So, ya just randomly get turned-on then?" Ichigo looked to him.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, when I come 'round, ya either hate my guts or ya wanna fuck. I mean, can ya just turn it on and off like that?"

"No. No one can you idiot. Sometimes I just need a little...release."

"So, that fight was 'ur release then, huh?"

"Most of it, yeah." Suddenly, Ichigo regretted his phrasing, glancing at Grimmjow's already mischievious smirk. "Fuck."

"Oh, yeah. We'll be doing lots of that."

"No, no! That's not what I--Mmphfff!" It didn't take very long to get the teenager to the ground and to throw aside the ice pack. With his now free hand, the Arrancar put it on the back of Ichigo's neck to pull him closer into the kiss he had given into so easily. The Shinigami shivered, Grimmjow's now ice-cold hand sending chills up and down his spine. He loved that feeling of the Espada's tongue sliding over his, like the other was tasting him. The Sexta Espada had always said that Ichigo tasted like vanilla (but this was just due to his toothpaste). Grimmjow tasted like nothing, unsurprisingly. Of course, Ichigo had half-expected this due to the fact that Jaggerjack couldn't eat or drink anything, therefore he put nothing in his mouth (besides one other thing of course).

Without noticing it, the hollow was able to remove most of the Shinigami's t-shirt. Jaggerjack managed to break the kiss long enough to say, "Shirt," which the meaning of should have been obvious. Ichigo hurriedly threw off the shirt, the Arrancar above him removing his jacket. The Vaizard would never tire of the feeling of skin on skin. They both stuck together due to some perspiration left over from the fight that had happened only minutes ago. The feel of the other's cut abs against his own taut stomach was something that made him sigh in satisfaction.

He probably should still be mad at the hollow that was currently mapping out his entire midsection with his hands, but he couldn't find the strength to be. He was too tired to try and force this away. Besides, this was always a welcome change from exchanging hello's with their fists. Yes, Grimmjow completely turned Kurosaki into a putty when they started kissing. He was such a woman sometimes.

The orange-haired teenager wrapped one leg around the back of the other's thigh, trying to draw him closer in attempt to feel more. He could already feel the beginnings of a hard-on through the Arrancar's hakama. Grimmjow rolled his hips forward, smirking to the younger of two below him. Ichigo gave a wanton moan, too trapped in his own lust to hold anything back.

"See? I was right, you do get turned on by fighting. Can't wait to have my cock in you, can you?" The Shinigami did what he could to assert his position in this, make it look like he wasn't going to totally take whatever Grimmjow was going to dish out. He rubbed at Grimmjow's dick through his pants, smiling.

"Can't wait to have my hands on you, can you?"

"Actually gonna dish some out this time?

"Oh, I'll do more than dish it out." Ichigo shoved Jaggerjack's pants to his thighs, letting his cock slip out. The teenager gave him one of those 'smart-ass' smirks, one that looked like Ichigo was in total control of the situation. Grimmjow sat back in realization.

"Oh," was all his managed to say as the Shinigami set to work on the shaft in front of him. Grimmjow knew the kid was inexperienced, but he never held that against the teenager. He loved that so-concentrated expression on the Shinigami's face which made it look like he was being tested. It was amusing, to say the least. Of course, he did appreciate a blowjob once in awhile, especially since he was giving them out most of the time. Kurosaki had a lot of facial expressions and some of his cuter ones came out when he was embarassed.

Jaggerjack's hand crept into the unruly mess of orange-hair near his crotch, urging him to go deeper and faster, to which Ichigo responded to in great enthusiam. The Espada almost came when he felt Ichigo swallow the head of him, almost gagging because he had gone too fast. He could feel the inexperienced tongue wiggle underneath him, like his cock was a tongue-depressor. Ichigo swallowed once more before backing away a little.

Grimmjow moaned deeply. He had to bite his lip from doing anymore. He was a man of pride, and letting an inexperienced teenager get that much of a reaction out of him was embarassing. He felt that moment that Ichigo's tongue traced the vein on the underside of his hard-on, which made him release into a hot mouth. He shivered a little when the end of the orgasm came, almost hearing the teenager swallow. Kurosaki's head rose as he wiped his mouth of any remnants.

"Fuck, that shit's nasty." Jaggerjack laughed.

"No one asked you to swallow."

"What the hell was I supposed to do with it?"

"You could've let me cum on your face."

"That's fucking gross!" The Arrancar laughed at the complete look of disgust the other's face held. "You're such a damn pervert." Grimmjow kissed the other boy, finding the taste of himself to be quite bitter. Ichigo leaned away for a moment, to give the hollow another look of disbelief. "Sounds like something they'd do in a porn."

"You watch porn?" Ichigo blushed.

"N-no."

"Look at it?"

"No!"

"Liar."

"W-what?"

"Well, we're a porn together, Ichi. Sweet, sweet porn," Jaggerjack gave one of those face-cracking smirks while Ichigo blushed heavily. "Now if only we had cheesy 70's porn music in the background."

"I fucking hate you sometimes."

"Bow-chicka-bow-wow."


	11. Audacious

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Audacious

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #27, "Overflow"

**Rating**: PG 13 [Lots of swear words and egotism

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

---------------

It's true that their relationship is quite the dictionary for new and improved curse words. They fight and curse like sailors, but really, deep down, they care for each other. Somewhat.

A little.

Miniscule.

...But that's not the point. There are three instances in which their curse words change.

Example number one would be their obvious arguments and ego matches they have whenever they see each other. It's like a ritual. When they fight, curse words are ten times more derogatory than they probably should be. Curse words like 'shit' and 'fuck' are constantly said to berate whoever they are aimed at.

'Shit' during their fights means that one of them is worth absolutley nothing; as in 'You're full of shit' or 'That's shit'.

'Fuck' would mean, in this situation, that one of them is completely moronic, idioic, or over-all retarded; as in 'Fuck-head' or 'Fucker'.

'Bastard' should be obvious, but it, too, changes during these times. To them it means pompous, stuck-up, or snobby, as in 'You're such a bastard'. It is also frequently used in conjuction with Aizen's name; at least when Grimmjow says it. Ichigo nevers even utters Aizen's name, so the man cannot gain any satisfaction of others saying his name in contempt or fear.

'Ass' is technically just a shorter-term for 'smart-ass'. It could also mean stupid, depending on the situation. See: 'Asshole', 'Ass-face', or 'Ass-clown'.

'Damn' is also a popular word among the two seeing as it is condemning them both to hell in words. See: 'Damn you', 'Goddamit', or the surpisingly clever combo of wors, 'Dammit, you fucking asshole, shit-bastard'. You learn something new everyday, they say.

---------------

Example number two, when curse words change, is when they have sex. Terms tend to take on a more perverted meaning or even, sometimes, sensual.

'Fuck' should be quite obvious. Most of the time it's coming from Grimmjow's mouth, but Jaggerjack loves it when Ichigo says it. See: 'Let's fuck' or 'Fuck me'. Usually, when the teenager says it, they're well into the screwing part of their relationship and it is said in a pleading tone. Sometimes, though, the Shinigami uses it when he takes the initiative to get the Arrancar into his pants and/or bed.

'Ass' is also a clear subject as it refers to the owner's posterior, or 'butt'. Of course, it's also used quite frequently in a perverted sense, as in 'Nice ass' or, another nice combo, 'Your ass is fuckable'. It could also be meant as an endearing term meaning 'dummy', such as: 'I love to fuck you, ass.'

'Damn' is also radically changed. It's most likely used in conjuction with a adjective to heighten the meaning. See: 'That feels so damn good' or 'Damn, that was great'. It could also be used in a pairing with another curse word to stress something. See: 'Dammit, fuck me, you ass'. Of course, ass would be used a derogatory word in this sense.

'Shit', in this situation, is meant as a warning; as in 'Shit, I'm gonna come'. Sometimes, though, it is said in the heat of the moment when plasure suddenly reaches its apex. See: 'Oh shit, that's good'. It's surprising that these things come up during their sexual play, anyways. Many would think these two would shut up for once when their in the middle of something as intimate as this.

---------------

The Final Example of when curse words change their meaning, is after-glow of their intercourse.

Or 'fuck-session' as Grimmjow would say.

The words they use don't so much change their meaning, as they do become lumped together to mean two things at once.

"That was fucking awesome."

"Yeah. I was surprised it would turn out like that after ya were bein' such a fuck-head about fuckin'. What were ya even talking about?"

"Shut up, you bastard. It's fucking natural for me to wanna be top once. The sex is damn good, but dammit, I get fucking bottom all the fucking time."

"Oi, I gave ya the choice, dick-weed. Ya can be top, but only if ya _ride_ me. Comprende?"

"That's bullshit."

"It's not like 'ur experienced enough to fuck me, Kurosaki. Compared ta me, 'ur still a shy little virgin, dammit."

"You're full of shit. I could fuck you into the ground."

And Jaggerjack couldn't help the smile that came onto his face.

"That a challenge, shit-head?"

"You know it, chicken-fucker."

Sometimes, the translation of their cursing is best left untouched.


	12. Ellict Memory, Illict Action

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Elicit Memory, Illicit Action

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #4, "Our Distance and That Person"

**Rating**: _**NC 17**_ [oral, hand job

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

---------------

Sometimes it was weeks before either party could see each other. Either party being one fifteen-year-old Shinigami (key word being fifteen-year-old), and a spontaneously horny Arrancar. Together it was a truly wonderful thing, but apart both parties were ill-tempered. During the weeks when he was sex-deprived, Ichigo would snap at almost anything. He was a ticking time bomb of anger and the fuse was barely two inches long. Grimmjow, too, had a nasty temper; threatening to disembowel anyone who would so much as look at him usually got people the fuck out of his field of vision. Nevermind that the next time the two would see each other they would fight like old enemies.

Of course, fucking like lusty lovers came right after that, but it was usually angry sex.

And who wants to come off a sexual euphoria only to feel horrible pain afterwards?

---------------

Ichigo set down his bookbag rather roughly on chair. Well, actually, he threw it onto his chair, but that's not the point. It had been three weeks since the boy had been laid and violence had been a good alternative. He had gone looking for fights this week, imagining he had been kicking or punching Grimmjow each time. The bastard deserved it. Not only because he was depriving Kurosaki, but because sometimes the Arrancar came at the worst possible times for sex and Ichigo had given him the time of day. Now where was the asshole when he _actually_ needed him? It was irratating to say the least.

Ichigo did remember one simple way to get rid of predicament; at least for the moment. The only bad thing was, he had done this three times last week.

Jerking-off was like watching football when you could be in a real fight, or watching porn when you could having great sex. Since Kurosaki was so addicted to Grimmjow's sexual prowess, jerking-off was nothing more than a formality. It was starting to get boring, but anything was better than no stimulation whatsoever.

The Shinigami considered himself lucky today seeing as his sisters weren't home yet and his father had run off to god-knows-where. He sighed as he locked his door and closed his blinds. Knowing his out of whack life, anybody could come popping in at any moment. Shinigami and the like never learned to knock or announce their presence, apparently. Finally, the teenager setteled onto his bed and tried to think of a fantasy that he hadn't thought of last week.

---------------

It was a memory that would never leave, even after all that the two had done together. It was the morning after their first kiss. He had been on his way to school, trying his damndest to forget the other night had happened. Not only did he kiss his enemy, but he had _enjoyed_ it. Throughly. He supposed that Grimmjow wouldn't come back after that. Maybe the thought of kissing him would settle in the Arrancar's head and the Espada would be forced to ask what the fuck he had done.

Ichigo never expected for the Sexta Espada to come out of absolutely _nowhere_ and try to maul his lips off his face. He couldn't remember exactly how it began, but he could remembered being pushed back onto an alleyway wall, far from the view of some passerby. The Shinigami had to pry the other off of him to voice his opinion.

"What the fuck?!" Or lack thereof. Grimmjow licked his lips mischieviously, grinning like a cheshire cat at Ichigo the entire time.

"Came back to finish what we started."

---------------

Ichigo blamed himself for having an overactive imagination and being able to remember what the kiss had felt like. The way those lips had felt, the way his teeth bit down on his lower lip, the way that Arrancar had sucked on his tongue. He could never forget the tongue itself either. Ichigo swears that if Grimmjow tried, he could've touched Kurosaki's tonsils with that thing. It made the teenager flush at the very things it could do.

The Shinigami remembered that, even though he had tried to block Grimmjow's assault, slim hands had opened his jacket and school shirt to touch the skin underneath. Kurosaki recalled that the fingers had been cold, a sweet and satisfying contrast to his heated skin.

Ichigo mirrored this memory, slowly popping the buttons on his shirt and slipping it off his chest. His thumb pad ghosted his own nipple as he remembered how the Arrancar had immediately attacked them with his tongue. The Shinigami's breath caught when his memory saw fit to bite the raised nipple while he pinched it.

It was almost as if that moron was here. Ichigo kept his eyes closed, recalling every detail of his little daydream, slowly letting his hand creep down to his pants. His recollection of that day was still crystal clear, even after Jaggerjack had started to tenderly flick his tongue across his protruding erection. Kurosaki sighed in content as he freed himself from his pants, thumbing his head slightly.

Grimmjow had sucked solely on the head of his cock for what seemed like an eternity, but _God_ it had felt so good.

Ichigo stroked himself slowly, now extremely hard from the memory. He remembered the blue-haired Arrancar lick down his shaft, hot breath flooding over his dick. Little by little, the Sexta Espada took the hardened shaft into his mouth, purposefully making perverted noises everytime the teenager's dick came out from between his lips.

Kurosaki trembled from the memory, coating his cock in precum to get the effect of his dream.

That tongue that belonged to the Arrancar did wonderful things to his dick, but his fingers were even better. They had found his tight entrance and one of them was able to make it in while the others teased the surronding area.

Ichigo let his free hand wander to his opening, two fingers wriggling inside and he continue to stroke himself at a faster pace. The memory was starting to become blurry.

Two bony fingers wiggled around inside while Grimmjow sucked him off at a faster pace. The two fingers almost immediately found the oh-so-great spot and rubbed continously.

The Vaizard, after some time, was able to find the patch of nerves and rubbed against it while his hand worked faster. His pants came over heavier, blood pounded in his ears. He could no longer recall the memory, the only sounds filling his ears were that of his own doing. The slippery hand against his cock, and his own moaning. He'd give anything right now to have Grimmjow there to finish him off.

A couple more strokes accompanied by his own fingering was enough to send him over the edge. He came with a deep groan and let his hands fall free.

Sex would've been better, but he guessed he could enjoy this for now.

---------------

After he had cleaned himself off, a quiet afternoon nap was in order. He didn't even hear his rambunctious family invade the house. After two hours or so, he found himself awaken from a good dream.

But he guessed he could yell at the awakener later. He was kissing Kurosaki rather nicely. Thin lips pulled away when they realized the reciever was waking up.

"Good morning, Ichi." The Shinigami looked up to see a naughty grin hovering over him, otherwise known as Grimmjow. Jaggerjack laid kisses along side of Ichigo's neck, surprised that the kid wasn't yelling at him for leaving that long. After a moment or so, the Vaizard spoke.

"I, uh, I jerked off to you today." Grimmjow chuckled.

"Oh, really? Well, then, we're in the same boat." It was quiet after that for a few more minutes, Jaggerjack already having worked off Ichigo's shirt. "Wanna fuck?" Ichigo pulled the blue-haired Hollow into a kiss.

"Hell yes."


	13. Cross Over

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Cross Over

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #5, "Ano sa...(Hey, you know...)"

**Rating**: PG 13 [swearing (as always)

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

---------------

"Ya look like such a wanna-be in those tattered clothes, man."

"Excuse me?"

"It's like 'ur tryin' too hard ta be this big bad-ass of a Shinigami. Like ya think 'ur the biggest fuckin' thing ta hit Soul Society since the Zanpaktou."

"At least I don't look like a fucking street whore with my jacket barely covering my ribs and open for all the world to see! Jackass!"

It had been a fairly bright and warm day outside. Ichigo didn't feel like wasting such a good day and had decidely skipped school. Nevermind that he and Grimmjow had already promised each other they would spend the day together.

This isn't like a normal couple's day out, though. When they spend the day together, they spar in the morning, fight, kill and generally maim hollows in the afternoon, and then screw at night. Their relationship has been on-going like this and neither are ready to change something that works. Besides, they had both already established that their relationship wasn't something born out of love. What they had was merely for a good work-out and an equally good time.

Right now, though, they were taking a break of hunting those annoying small-fry Hollows and somehow, this conversation started. If there is one thing that should be forever known about Grimmjow Jaggerjack and Ichigo Kurosaki's relationship, it should be that the two never go two minutes without arguing or fighting about something. It isn't necessarily a bad thing; it keeps them both on their toes.

"I can't help what Aizen-bastard gives us ta wear. Everyone's outfit is different." Ichigo snorted at this, putting his chin into his hands, and placing his elbows on his knees.

"He probably thinks you're his little bitch, or something." Grimmjow's face darkened at this.

"Fuck 'im! I ain't nobody's bitch, _especially_ not Aizen's. I swear, one of these days, I'm gonna kill 'im and skull-fuck his corpse. Fuckin' stuck-up bastard."

"Well, it's the same thing with me. This is just an outfit. I can't help what I wear during my bankai. Retard." There was silence for a moment before Grimmjow smirked at the Shinigami sitting next to him. He suddenly had a very crazy idea, and if there was one thing Grimmjow liked about himself, it was his crazy ideas. Ichigo became wary of the Arrancar at this moment, knowing full well that smirk meant nothing but trouble. Usually for himself. "Do I even want to know what you're thinking?"

"Oh, I was just thinkin' that those clothes suit you well, ya know. Since 'ur an angsty, loner bitch."

"I do not, you fucking ass!" Jaggerjack chuckled.

"Yeah, 'ur right. You'd look like an _angtsy, loner __**bitch**_ in anythin'."

"I could make even your clothes look bad-ass, whore."

"Is that a challenge I hear?" Kursaki stood with a determined look on his face, suddenly stripping himself of his clothes. Jaggerjack smirked, throughly happy with the results of his idea. A free strip show; he couldn't ask for more.

---------------

After both Shinigami and Arrancar had swapped clothes, they looked at each other and almost laughed. Well, the Sexta Espada almost tackeled the teenager to the ground in order to fuck him senseless. Grimmjow felt oddly strange in Shinigami clothing, even though it wasn't very different from his own. The sleeves and hakama legs were shorter on him and the clothes fit him a lot more snugly than they would if they were on Kurosaki. The jacket wouldn't even close around him, because his chest and shoulders were broader than Ichigo's.

Jaggerjack concluded that he indeed like his clothing better on Ichigo. The jacket could close around the top half of the Vaizard's torso, but his abs were left for Grimmjow to see. His favorite part about the whole cross-over was the fact that his hakama kept trying to slip off of Ichigo's hips. Seeing the Shinigami blush about this and trying to keep the pants up was too hilarious and turn-on.

"Hey, ya know...those actually look good on ya."

"They don't even fit me right," Ichigo said, emphazing by pulling his pants up _again_. Grimmjow smiled lecherously, leaning in to steal a kiss from the stunned Shinigami.

"Well, I got a way to get ya out of 'em," the Arrancar concluded, sticking his hands on the other's hips to help the white fabric down the teenager's sides. Grimmjow chuckeled, looking at the blushing Shinigami. "I love it when a plan comes together."


	14. El Sangre Mente

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_30 Drabbles for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: _El Sangre Mente_

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Fandom**: Bleach

**Theme**: #19, "Red"

**Rating**: PG 13--ish

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

**Notes**: I read this comment recently: "Long live fluffy Grimmy." It made me want to stab a kitten. Grimmjow's a **panther**; not a domestic house cat. There's a reason a couple of the Bleach chapters were named "Jugulators". Jaggerjack would sooner rip out your throat than be play with catnip. Okay? Okay.

---------------

It was the smell.

Over all other senses, the smell of it was the best. That slightly pungent scent that wafted so silkily into his nose. It danced in his nostrils and twirled around his mind. The sight of it made him lick his lips; the smell sent him into a frenzy. Animal insticts turned on, like a switch, like it was just so natural for it all to fall into place. It was, anyway, for that predator in him to awaken so freely just because his olfactory receptions suddenly went berserk.

The feeling made him ecstatic.

Ichigo never understood.

Of course he wouldn't. The teenager was _human_ afterall. The only animalistic urges the kid had were purely sexual.

Not that he could complain.

He was entirely surprised that the Hollow in the Shinigami didn't understand. The maniacal being didn't appreciate the coppery substance all too much. Said embodiment of evil insulted him more by saying the smell was _awful_.

The only thing he and the Hollow had in common was the love of the hunt. Similarities stopped short there.

Kurosaki found in incessantly _strange_--if anything--that the Arrancar was so interested in the sticky liquid. The Vaizard had called him a vampire on many occasions.

Grimmjow found it _incessantly stupid_ that the kid couldn't get his mythological creatures right. Jaggerjack didn't like the taste of it; it was like shoving pennies in your mouth.

The Espada pitied the poor boy that he couldn't come to grips with his fuck-buddies' unusual tastes. If the Shinigami had, he probably would've fought a lot harder not to get cut. The smell of blood drove him wild in his normal state as it was; his released state was a whole different story.

Grimmjow could smell droplets of the liquid from miles away in his released form. When the odor drifted towards him, he stopped looking at his opponents as beings with sentience.

He looked at them only as slabs of walking meat.

Dinner time.


	15. Fornication

**A Sardonic Liaison**

_An Extra Drabble for Grimmjow and Ichigo_

---------------

**Chapter Title**: Fornication

**Tie-in Chapter(s)**:

Privacy

**Author**: gogodgene

**Pairing**: Grimmjow x Ichigo

**Rating**: NC 17 [Wonderful smut

**Disclaimer**: I don't own anything. If I did, I wouldn't be writing _fanfiction_. Alas, everything belongs to Kubo Tite.

**Notes**: The next couple of chapters in this series are _extremely_ short. They barely fill up half the page. So, in the meantime, here's a chapter devoted to nothing but hot smut. Yay? Yay.

---------------

It hadn't taken them long to find a suitable place to screw (actually, it hadn't take Grimmjow long. Ichigo still opposed this idea with his colorful language, saying that he had wanted to escape his house only. He did not give the Arrancar permission to fuck him), which happened to be in the Infirmary. Surprisingly, the Nurse's station had comfortable beds, and they were smidge bigger than his bed at home. As always, Grimmjow wasted no time getting both of them undressed.

"Goddamn, slow down you horny bastard."

"Can't," Grimmjow managed to say between all the growling and nipping at Kurosaki's lips, "Need to fuck you."

"Well, then kiss me properly, retard," Ichigo emphasized by crushing their lips together, quickly opening his mouth to not waste any time. Jaggerjack hated the way the shinigami always argued with him, even when he was just as horny as the arrancar was. What was the point to all of it if the stupid-ass wanted to screw just as badly? He tried not to think about it as he felt the vaizard's tongue trace along the underside of his own busy muscle. The blue-haired hollow smiled as a shiver rushed through him. That same muscle slid along the edges of his teeth, which made him groan. The kid knew what he liked. Of course, the teen had nothing on the hollow. The Espada knew every pleasure point on the shinigami's body; knew that when he swiped his tongue across the top of the others, like so--.

"Ahn...," the kid wouldn't hold back the needy little moan. When he let his hands roam, slightly ghosting a pink nipple, the kid would say: "Grimm," which meant 'Stop teasing'. And since they were naked already, it was so much more pleasureable to slide their dicks together.

"Fuck," Ichigo whined. Oh yeah, they'd get to that. Grimmjow smirked to himself, his tongue moving to play with the shinigami's sensitive ear.

"See, this wasn't so bad. No one's around ta bug us and I get to hear ya make the fuckin' sexiest sounds ever."

"Stop talking," the teen whined, fingers digging into the other's back. Jaggerjack laughed to himself. He was nowhere near heading south anytime soon and the kid was grabbing on like he was already sucking cock. Said Espada moved down, nipping at the other's jaw and collarbone. His fingers did nothing more than tease the growing erection under him, which was aggravating the shinigami to no end. The vaizard rolled his hips into that hand that was having so fun _torturing_ him, telling the owner of it to palm, rub, jerk, _something_ with more feeling that those barely-there touches. "Fuck, Grimm, _touch me_."

"I am touchin' ya," he replied teasingly. Ichigo blushed hard, not wanting to say what was on the tip of his tongue, but knew he wouldn't get through to the horny bastard any other way. The young Kurosaki hissed as the hollow bit into his shoulder; something that wouldn't show up if he wore a t-shirt.

"You know what I mean, shit-head."

"Ah, well, if 'ur gonna call me stupid, then no, I don't know what ya mean." The vaizard felt that wonderous tongue tracing circles around his nipple and shivered.

"Jerk me off you asshole," Ichigo managed to speak through a moan. The Sexta Espada smiled at the teen, enclosing his fist around the shinigami's hard-on, and gave a quick jerk.

"Like that?"

"More," the vaizard sighed, closing his eyes in pleasure. Grimmjow rubbed his thumb around the now-weeping head of the teen's dick, sucking and nipping on the pink buds that throbbed with hurt. The teen's body wriggled around restlessly as the other's mouth moved lower, finally reaching Ichigo's navel. The arrancar's tongue dipped into the indent, tongue lapping out on the edges.

"Nhnnn," Ichigo purred. The hollow smiled, his tongue suddenly withdrawing. Kurosaki opened hazy eyes to look at the man above him in question. He could barely keep them open, though, not with how Grimmjow's hands were stroking him. "Grimm..." The shinigami pleaded.

"What do ya want, Ichi?"

"Don't stop."

"Stop, what?" The hollow was having too much fun getting the kid to turn red. Ichigo wasn't used to bluntly stating what he want; Jaggerjack always happened to know exactly what he wanted.

"I want your mouth on me," Kurosaki pleaded, flushed in embarassment.

"Where?" Grimmjow whispered.

"You know where," there was that exhasperation in his tone, again. Was it really so hard to say what he needed to say?

"Ya hafta tell me where, Ichi."

"...On my cock, dammit."

"Gladly." The Espada's hand was quickly replaced with his tongue, the pink muscle already swirling around the top. It slid down slowly, tickling the vein on the underside of the teen's erection. Ichigo had to grip the sheets on the bed to keep them from pulling hair. The young Kurosaki gasped when he felt one of the hollow's pointed canines graze that same vein. Jaggerjack's lips enclosed around the head, sucking and moving down at an slow pace. Ichigo shivered everytime he heard a slurp or a popping sound when the other's mouth came off his hard-on. He knew Grimmjow could suck him off quietly, he just chose to make those sounds on purpose. Hot breath flooded the head of his erection, that powerful muscle called a tongue teasing the slit.

"Uhnnn, faster, Grimm, or I swear to God I'm going to come right now." Said Espada smirked, deep-throating the other with the talent of a veteran. Ichigo almost screamed with he felt the other's throat muscles move around his dick, swallowing him. The young shinigami found it amazing that the other could still move his tongue around a little bit, even with his erection still all the way in. That little bit of movement pushed him over the edge and he came with a deep moan. Fortunately, after so many times of blowing the teen, he had recognized the stiffness the shinigami's body took when he was about to orgasm, and moved his mouth the hell out of the way. If he couldn't swallow, then he didn't want the stuff in his mouth at all. It three times nastier to spit it out somewhere.

The vaizard sighed, glancing to his stomach (which was now mess), but not blaming Grimmjow. It wasn't his fault, for once.

The arrancar was all smiles as he stole another kiss from the shinigami, the teen knowing what happened next.

"Hey, Ichi," the hollow whined.

"What?"

"Do me a favor." Ichigo growled at the prospect of doing the Espada a favor: which most likely included something embarassing and very sexual because of their situation.

"Ride me today."

"What?!"

"C'mon, I gave ya that blow job. I could've just jerked ya off, ya know." The young Kurosaki mumbled a string of curses, which Jaggerjack took as a 'yes'. The teen usually cursed a lot when Grimmjow asked to do something he didn't want to do, but complied to it anyway. The Sexta Espada laughed, flipping onto his back, and put his hands behind his head.

"You're a fucking lazy bastard, Grimm," Ichigo commented as he used the precum from the arrancar's cock as lube. Jaggerjack never got tired of the embarassed face the kid sported when he fingered himself, knowing the arrancar was watching too intently. Only Grimmjow knew that he could get off on just looking at that face alone.

Ichigo guided the erection in, slightly nervous about the whole situation. He whimpered quietly when he had pushed the top part of the hollow's dick into himself. Sure, he had prepped himself, but it wasn't proper lube and there wasn't much of it. He knew that he would have to shut the fuck up and deal with it if he didn't want to be accused of 'whining like a bitch' later. They had done this once before, but Ichigo had been too inexperienced even with regular sex that Grimmjow had to guide him the entire time. He refused to be lead like that again, wanting this time for the more experienced party to come solely because he was half-way decent at this.

The shinigami let himself become accustomed to the girth of the other's hard-on, trying to relax. He must've been pushing himself, or going too fast, because Grimmjow's hands clenched on his hips lightly, telling him to take it easy.

"Don't tear yourself up, Ichi," he warned.

The hybrid breathed a sigh of relief as he felt himself loosen up, the arrancar's erection just barely scraping over that sweet spot. His arousal was back at the mere feel of it. Slowly, his hips lifted and dropped.

Rolled back and forth.

That spot was in his reach, the head of the cock inside of him grazing it ever time he dropped himself back down. He was already panting, growling at his inability to aim for his own prostate. Jaggerjack could care less at the moment, recognizing that the teen was getting much better at this. The tight muscles around his erection clenched and unclenched, rubbed and slid against him. His face was flushed, he was shivering, and thrusting up haphazardly. The shinigami tried to match his pace, but couldn't. Too caught up in the moment, the arrancar took hold of the vaizard's hips again, matching both of their paces into one speed: hard and fast. Ichigo was moaning loudly, so he must've finally hit that patch of nerves. Grimmjow could hear his own cries, mixed in with exhausted breaths. The shinigami was clenching harder around him.

They were both near the end.

"Grimmjow," he heard the teen say. The kid knew how much he liked his name to be said when they had sex. Eventually, though, the name became a meaningless jumbles of sounds and moans.

Ichigo came first.

Grimmjow didn't trail far behind.

Both of them struggeled to catch their breath, the shinigami spread out on top of the arrancar.

"Wow," the arrancar hesistantly said. "Ya got a lot better at that." Ichigo managed a smug smile.

"Maybe you're just coming faster."

"Whatever. Shut your damn mouth and go to sleep."

---------------

He knew he was supposed to be finding blackmail, and he _really_ didn't mean to stay for the show, but c'mon.

Any pervert would've stayed for _that_ show; straight or not.

Outside on school grounds, Urahara was sure he had a nose bleed.


End file.
